Writermom's Blog

A practical eReader comparison: Nook vs Kindle et al

2011-01-12T18:11:00.006-06:00

For months I researched and did comparisons between the various eReaders on the market. I compared the Nook, the Kindle, and the Sony Reader. I compared issues such as price, battery life, availability of books and prices for books, and overall convenience. While I was doing this research I tried to do a lot of it online--I figured eReaders--eResearch right? Not so much. I found these long articles written by techies about what the differences were but none of it really spoke to me. So here's what I eventually learned and why I choose the Nook over all the other options on the market.

I found that for the most part price of the eReaders, prices of the books, availability of the books and other issues are very comparable. With the Sony Reader the only way to download new books is to plug the USB cord into your computer and transfer books that way. With both the Nook and the Kindle you can choose from a wifi option, or a 3G option. The wifi option is about $50 cheaper and ultimately what I went with since we have wifi at home and you only need internet access to download a book, not to read it so why pay $50 more for built-in Internet if you're not using it most of the time?

The deal breaker for me was that with the Kindle the battery is "hard-wired" into the mechanism. You cannot ever replace it. If your rechargeable battery stops holding a charge (which, come on we all know that rechargeable batteries do over time) you have to replace your Kindle. With the Nook if your battery begins to fail you can simply replace the battery for $30.

So, $160 for a new Kindle, or $30 for a new battery. You do the math.

You guessed it, I ultimately went with the Nook.

And I have L-O-V-E-D every minute of owning it. I got it for my birthday in October, I have read dozens of books. The battery life is phenomenal. I can add music to the Nook and listen to my favorite music while I'm reading, or walking on the treadmill. Books are available to read within about 15 seconds of clicking 'download'. I just today got around to adding the Micro-SD card, and with that inserted I can carry something like 3,000 books around in my purse. What's not to love?

Wow, I actually still remember the password!

2011-01-03T18:20:00.003-06:00

I haven't blogged in AGES! I can't really explain why, other than with changing jobs came a lot of other unexpected changes and I just felt like my creativity had disappeared! The job didn't end up being the right one for me and I've actually changed jobs AGAIN! Hopefully for the last time for a very very long time! This change came without the exciting traveling to places like New York City and Provo, Utah! LOL If Provo is exciting I missed it...it's beautiful, don't get me wrong but "exciting" didn't really fit the description. :)

I love, love, love, love my new job! Did I mention that I love it? For some reason the busier I am, the more creative I feel. It's bizarre! But with the job change and the insanely busy wall-to-freaking-wall schedule I actually think about my creative endeavors more often! I think about writing all the time, even have story ideas stashed away in my brain. I got a new camera recently and thought hmmm, I should digiscrap again!

So quick update on everything else. My kids keep me even busier than the job! My son is moving up the ranks in karate and trying his hand at a few other sports here and there (soccer, football and next up basketball). My daughter is taking every dance class she can get her hands on and has joined a non-profit group that helps teach kids to use their God given talents to improve their self-esteem and help others. It's such a blessing!

Hubby and I are communicating and getting along better than ever. I truly feel like my 40s are the best years of my life.

I'll do my best to visit more frequently and post more often!

Hmmmm

2010-03-08T08:22:00.001-06:00

Does the fact that my blog comments have suddenly been overrun by Chinese speaking spammers mean I've reached some level of blogging success? LOL

At any rate, sorry dear friends who read and comment and others who find the blog and leave appreciated comments but I've switched to moderated comments because the spam is making me crazy (crazier?).

Whirlwind trip to NYC and some celebrity sightings to share!

2010-01-22T09:16:00.002-06:00

Earlier this week I made an absolutely whirwind trip to New York City and back in one day. It was for a job interview and while I definitely consider that part of the trip a success (fingers crossed and all that) the trip as a whole was mostly just exhausting!

My return flight was delayed which led to an almost 4 hour span of time where I sat at LaGuardia airport desperately wanting to get on the plane just so I could doze off for a few minutes. But, as luck would have it, I saw a few celebrities to keep myself entertained!

First, I saw Ted Danson in one of the airport book stores--buying magazines and gum. :) I saw him again walking through the terminal. He really just looked like an average guy that you had that moment of "I know him" and then I realized who he was.

The real story though is my brush with the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders. If you read my blog regularly you know that my daughter is a HUGE fan of all things dance related and she really enjoys watching the show about the Cheerleaders on CMT each year. This year marked Maddy's 2nd audition for her own dance school's dance team and she came up just 2 points short of making the team.

When I walked up to the security line I saw one of the girls and had one of those "hmm, where do I know her from?" moments. Mind you I'd been up since 3 am at this point and my brain was probably taking a nap. After I saw several of the other girls talking to her I put it together and smiled to myself and thought not much else of it. A few more of the girls walked up behind me in line, just making general chit-chat conversation. I overheard them wondering if they needed to keep their ID's out and I told them that I'd heard a security officer announce a moment earlier that we did and a conversation struck up from there. Turns out one of the girls standing with me is originally from St Louis, and we just passed the twenty minutes or so in security line talking about airport fun (not), security stuff, St Louis, how much the Rams suck (ha) and other stuff! When I got through security I told them by, have a great flight and went off to my own gate where I texted Maddy and told her I'd met them. She was SO EXCITED, I immediately wished I'd asked them for a photo or something to give her as a souvenire.

Luck was on my side and a few minutes later the whole squad walked up and their gate was across from mine. Now, I've never asked anyone for their autograph in my life. Not that I've met oodles of celebrities but I've seen a few and I've just never been into that. But I'd had such a good experience talking to Ally, I was comfortable walking up to her, telling her my daughter enjoys seeing them on TV and asking her for a photo/autograph.

Let me tell you these women were SO nice I am not truly able to express it here in words. They were busy, waiting for a flight, I'm sure tired after a day of performing and traveling and yet the three who were sitting together (Ally, Abigail, and Joannah) immediately dug in their bags, asked her names and signed a photo for her with a personalized message to her to KEEP DANCING and have fun with it. Ally then gave me a personal message to tell Maddy that at 11 it's all about having fun and learning techniques and not to let anything keep her from pursuing her dreams whatever they may be.

Maddy was over the moon thrilled to have a professional dancer give her this pat on the back and those photos are now holding a place of honor in her bedroom.

I took away a very positive impression of these women and their attitude and warm personalities. Thanks ladies!

Catching up!

2010-01-14T20:22:00.002-06:00

Wow I can't believe I've gone a month since I blogged last! Here's a semi-quick catch up and I'll try to get back in the swing of blogging more regularly.

Weight loss: To date I've lost a total of 38 lbs! It was MUCH more difficult to get to the gym over the holidays with the kids home and of course there's a lot of tempting treats available, too! But I'm proud to say I still managed to lose about 2 lbs per week!

Kids: Nicholas has been taking karate for a few weeks now and we're noticing a huge change in his shyness. It's really helping his confidence and that in turn is helping him to be more outgoing and social. In fact, we hardly ever notice him being bashful or shy anymore. Maddy is doing great in school and really coming into her own as a young lady.

And last but not least, my dad's health. *sigh* It's a mixed bag of news on this front...he still has pain at his incision site from the bypass surgery (July 08!), the spot on his lung they were concerned about has completely disappeared from antibiotics and therefore is NOT cancerous (whew), his bladder is still not functioning on its own, the doctors have no idea why and there's absolutely no hope of repairing it. At this point the prognosis is to self-cathetarize himself for the rest of his life. And in the scans for the lung they've now discovered a problem with his thyroid! He has to make an appointment with an ear/nose and throat doctor to have a follow up with that. At this point my dad now has a general practice doctor, a lung doctor and a lung surgeon, a heart doctor and a heart surgeon, and a neurologist, and now an ear, nose and throat doctor!

Hectic Holidays

2009-12-12T13:42:00.002-06:00

Normally this time of year is my favorite season. I absolutely adore being Santa Claus for my children. I've often said that it's my favorite part of being a Mom! I love sneaking and filling the stockings and then secretly knowing I'm responsible for all that joy and excitement on Christmas morning. I love secretly fulfilling their wishes and even getting the thing they really truly want and having it waiting for them under the tree Christmas morning. There's nothing that warms my heart more than those feelings on Christmas morning and in those few special moments all the hustling and stress and hurrying around are more than worth it!

This year, I can't seem to get myself in the spirit of the season. My kids have made their lists...but I've yet to purchase anything from them! We're not buying for any adults this year because money is too tight, and because my job situation is too uncertain. It wasn't our idea alone, every adult on both sides of the family suggested we just buy for the kids this year because of their own uncertain economic situations.

My sister and her husband are divorcing, it's just a matter of signing the papers and it's done. So for the first time we're having a difficult time figuring out when we can get together to celebrate the holidays because of custody arrangements and things.

Hubby's sister is pregnant and due any day with her first child.

I've started working for a wonderful woman who lives locally and runs a retail website that was in need of some TLC. She's an amazingly sweet woman and I'm very, very grateful for the chance to make some extra money that makes up for the loss in income I've had from my regular job. Working two part-time jobs definitely fills my days up to the max!

It seems like when I have time to do shopping, I don't have the money or the energy, and if I have the money or the energy there's simply no time! I know everything will come together in the end, and everyone will have a Merry Christmas, I just hope I manage to get in the spirit by then as well!

Drum Roll Please!

2009-12-01T09:37:00.002-06:00

And the winner is ME! The Biggest Loser group I participated in wrapped up last week and I just found out yesterday I won! Wahoo! $150 coming my way but the best part is I've dropped a total of 30 lbs (and counting!) and everyday I can tell a difference in the way my body looks, and feels!

25 Lbs and counting!

2009-11-16T09:37:00.002-06:00

I have officially lost 25 lbs and counting so far! Wahoo! Not bad considering there's a VAT of Halloween candy on my kitchen counter! LOL

Riding the roller coaster

2009-11-15T18:36:00.003-06:00

This week has been a roller coaster in the extreme. Thursday was the lowest of the lows but by Friday I'd begun to find the silver lining and pick myself back up. I keep hearing the phrase "you can knock me down, but I'll get back up" in the back of my head. So, I'm exploring new opportunities and thinking about the possibilities that reinventing myself presents. Who do I really want to be? What's my real dream job? Where does God really want me to be?

Of those three questions, the only one I can answer is that I believe that God wants me to be at home with my kids. For the last 6.5 years we've made sacrifices so that could be possible. For the last 9 months those sacrifices have paid off both in a financial way and in seeing our kids grow to new heights! But, I also believe that He wants me to be able to feed my kids. :)

Who is that person? Oh wait it's ME!

2009-10-19T15:41:00.003-05:00

I joined a gym...crazy right? LOL I am not a fan of working out, never have been. I've enjoyed being physical, going for walks, or bike rides with the family, I even swim laps when we're in the pool but the whole "I'm going to workout" mentality was just foreign to me! I've started on work out plans, bought DVD's or set goals but never followed through on them for more than a few days.

I hate mornings, so getting up earlier than absolutely required so I can workout--which I didn't want to do to begin with--was never, ever going to happen.

It's all I can do most days to gather up the energy to shower & get ready once for the day so once it is done I do not want to do anything that might undo it...like sweat!

But as I've said I started working out with a group of friends a couple of months ago and the craziest thing happened--I mean CRAZY--the days the workout was the hardest those were teh days I most looked forward to going! I even found myself telling the trainer running the group I thought we could take things to the next level! Me! How did THAT happen?

And then I joined another group of friends who were doing an email version of The Biggest Loser tv show...and I won the first week. Turns out I'm a smidge (if a smidge is the size of the grand canyon) competitive. The weeks I don't win I'm majorly bummed out! The weeks I do win I'm so proud of myself people probably see me and think "what is she strutting around about?"!

So the workout group has started to fizzle a little. My sister is going through a divorce, and going back to school while taking care of 3 young kids, another mom is a teacher, the single ladies stopped coming weeks ago, and one girl's work schedule changed...plus it's COLD outside these days in Illinois. So I found myself persuading the Hubby to join the local YMCA so I could continue to workout.

Last Friday was my first day belonging to the gym, so I went and did about an hour workout. Today I found myself watching the clock looking forward to the time I'd designated I would go workout! I worked out for 90 minutes and really made myself leave because 1) my stomach was growling and 2) I was afraid if I stayed and did more I wouldn't be able to walk tomorrow.

I think I might be addicted to this!

So far I've lost 22 pounds and I can't even guess how many inches...but enough that I've dropped a full jeans size.

9 Weeks & Counting!

2009-10-09T11:19:00.003-05:00

I just realized that tonite marks my 9th week of working out! I'm really proud of myself for sticking with this and I'm trying to think of the entire process as a life change not a diet or a temporary phase in any way. Most of the last 3-4 weeks I've been the only one to show up, which makes the work outs less fun, but also makes them take considerably less time which is good!

The only workouts I've missed in this 9 week period have been due to weather concerns (thunderstorms!) since we're currently working out outdoors. Since it's getting towards mid-October now everytime we workout we talk about needing to find an indoor location to continue through the winter months. I'm not sure what we're going to work out and honestly I'm starting to think I might be better off to join the local YMCA or a local gym to continue my workouts through the winter since then I could do it at my own convenience and not be dependent on anyone else's schedule.

In past years I'd have worried that I'd stop going if I left the workout group and started depending solely on my own motivation to keep exercising but I've found that I really LOOK FORWARD to work out days. Especially Fridays when we do abs & legs which is just an absolute killer routine! I come home feeling so proud of myself and with a great sense of accomplishment...and also quite smelly & sweaty but that's another discussion entirely. :)

I'm much stronger and toned than when is started...I've gone from doing the arm routine with 3 lb weights and barely getting through to doing most of the routine with 5 lbs and getting through mostly problem free! And I've gone from not being able to finish the leg & ab routine without weights to wearing 5 lb ankle weights and I'm able to finish!

So far I've lost 15 lbs and I'm sure many more inches than that but I've never stopped to measure myself. I know my jeans are literally falling off of me though which is never a bad thing!

Playing catch up

2009-09-29T10:56:00.002-05:00

As you can probably tell by my lack of blogging things have been hectic around here the last few weeks. I'll come back soon and share a little insight into that (it's not my story to share), but I wanted to update you on some other big things going on in my life.

First, thanks to all of you who went out of your way to express your thoughts & concerns for my dad in his latest health issue. While it's still an in progress situation and we don't have any definitive answers just yet, we have made a lot of progress and I'm happy to share that at this point our concerns have been alleviated somewhat. After seeing a specialist in St Louis my parents have been reassured that the chances that the mass on my dad's lung is cancerous is 5% or lower, and if it is cancer it's a type that's easily treatable and very, very slow growing. Their initial suspicion is that the spot is an infection, and since he's currently on anbitiotics for a bladder infection they're going to let that round of antibiotics run its course and then reevaluate him at the beginning of next month. If the spot has shrunk, they'll have confirmation that the antibiotics are working. If it's grown or is unchanged they'll do further scans and discuss biopsy options, etc.

Now, the reason he's on the antibiotics is because over the last few months my dad's bladder has failed to work. He's having to catheterize himself several times a day. The initial suspicion was that it was caused by a bladder infection. Seeing specialists who have looked back through my dad's medical files through the last year the specialist can see that his bladder is enlarged on scans he had last August. An initial round of antibiotics relieved the symptoms temporarily but the infection has returned and is now a different type of infection--so a different type of antibiotics is now the course of action. The concern is that the bladder is a muscle and typically once a muscle stops to work it does not restart so he may have to wear a catheter for life. My dad is 62 years old. Ongoing thoughts & prayers for both situations is appreciated!

Now to end on a much lighter note, several weeks ago I mentioned that I had begun working out with a group of friends and a mutual friend who is studying to become a personal trainer. I'm happy to report that I'm still working out and I'm actually enjoying it. You truly have no idea how shocking that is for me...that I enjoy working out! I've also begun participating with another group of friends in a version of The Biggest Loser. Basically each of us kick in $10, weigh ourselves each Tuesday, and whoever loses the most weight in 10 weeks gets the pot ($150). So far in two weeks I've lost 15 lbs!

More Health Worries for my Dad

2009-09-14T13:10:00.002-05:00

I just got a phone call that the nodules in my dad's lungs they pronounced too small to identify back in January were seen today on his follow-up scan and had grown from "smaller than the head of a pin" to "larger than the size of a quarter"! The pulmonologist says they have to be removed now which means surgery on his lungs.

My mom was freaking out when she called my sister and all of us are thinking about the 40+ years of smoking plus the years of off and on working with asbestos materials for work.

More information to come!

Music, Music, Music!

2009-08-31T15:34:00.002-05:00

Sorry for the delayed follow up to the post about the musical Maddy was in last weekend--between the show and school starting the days have been flying by! The show went great and they raised over $5,000 for Pediatric Cancer research! Maddy had a blast--which let's face it is the important part, right? And can't wait to do it again next year!

In other news...we have a new family member in our house as of this weekend--say hello to Miken!

There's No Business Like Show Business

2009-08-21T10:43:00.002-05:00

Tonight is opening night of the show Maddy is participating in called Kids Caring for Cancer. It's a musical (i.e. singing & dancing) show featuring broadway show tunes, rock & roll, gospel, country and jazz music and all the proceeds raised go to benefit pediatric cancer research. I'm really, really proud of her for wanting to participate and for doing all the hard work to get ready--it's been a summer filled with practices! Some of the kids in the show are very, very impressive and while Maddy only has a few smaller parts it's a great experience for her, and a great lesson in how you can give back without opening your pocketbook and by just doing something you already enjoy doing.

Okay, enough of that sunshine and smiles routine...just like everytime she goes on stage for something I am completely freaked out at the never ending list of things that could go wrong! What if she falls? What if she forgets her choreography? What if she comes out with her skirt tucked in her underwear? :)

For one of the routines she's supposed to wear "church clothes & shoes" and as the seasons are changing and she is growing like a weed we didn't really have clothes or shoes that fit that description. Maddy says to me on the way home last night "everyone else has on little heels". *sigh* Do you remember your first pair of heels? Do you remember trying to walk in them? Do you think you'd have enjoyed doing that on stage? LOL

Oy...I'm going to be both exhausted and a crazy person by the time this weekend is over!

Be careful what you wish for

2009-08-15T07:35:00.002-05:00

Last night was our regular workout in the park session...only when I got there I was the only one who was able to make it last night. Be careful what you wish for, because the undivided attention of a former Marine turn personal trainer might be more than you can handle!

As I said before I have no illusions that I'm in good shape or anything like that but damn...I seriously thought there were points last night when I was going to fall down. No exaggerating, I stood up, and my legs wouldn't hold me...thankfully there was a table nearby to surreptitiously lean on!

Last night we did abs and legs for the first time (for me). Reverse sit-ups, crunches, oblique sit-ups were the highlights of the abs and definitely not a good time but it was really the legs that stole the show with squats in two different forms and leg lifts. All exercises were done in 3 sets of twenty and for the squats the FIRST set of twenty about did me in.

Today my thights are so sore I can barely sit down and stand up, steps are a challenge too but I manage. We have a picnic in the park wedding reception this afternoon with the in-laws and unless I miss my guess my walking funny will raise a few eyebrows, which is really too bad because my ultimate dream goal with this was to work my ass off (literally) and not have anyone really know until whalla I was thin, tone and beautiful. I'm guessing the loud OW that slips through my lips when I sit down might give me away. :)

Sometimes it's HARD to be a mom

2009-08-13T18:16:00.002-05:00

There's some ugly little truths about being a mom--especially a stay-at-home mom--that nobody ever really talks about except with other SAHM's and even then it's definitely under their breath, or with an eye roll.

The truth of the matter is there are days you will wish you were anywhere but at home with your kids--shocking right? Staying home with your kids is a blessing, and a luxury and we're supposed to appreciate it with every fiber of our beings, right? And most of the time I do, but there are days when honestly I'd flip burgers at McDonald's if I could get out of this house for a few hours.

Another truth that no one will ever tell you is that no matter how close together, or far apart you space your children, no matter whether you have all boys, all girls, or some of each there are days when world war three will erupt in your house. No wait--not days...WEEKS! Those times will be briefly interrupted with them playing together so sweetly you'll wonder if you're hallucinating but they WILL happen. And nothing you can say to them will get them to behave like the Brady's did!

There are also days when you will wonder to yourself why you were so anxious for your little darlings to learn to speak because you'd like nothing more than to hear silence!

No matter how proud you are of your kids on a daily basis, they are guaranteed to do something in public that will make you consider, if only briefly, pretending you don't know who they belong to. Please note, this incident will probably coincide with the time they begin to pick out their own clothes!

The bottom line is there are days when being a mom is hard work--harder than you ever expected and there will be plenty of days when you'll be pretty much convinced you've done it all wrong--from nursing to potty training to playdates! At least that's how it is for me, and usually about the time I'm ready to throw my hands in the air and admit I have NO idea what I'm doing...one of them manages to do something to remind me why I'm here, and why I love it...most of the time.

Work Out-Day 2

2009-08-12T19:55:00.002-05:00

Made it to the work out in the park again tonight! Monday was cancelled because of the weather (it was 95* and then thunderstormed!) so this was day 2 for me, and the second day of arms. The 4th day after doing arms last time I couldn't bend my arms enough to scratch my nose, brush my hair or put make up on my face! Hopefully this time I'm less sore.

Next work out is scheduled for Friday and then the "kick butt" session is on Saturday. Unfortunately Saturday is really the only day that's difficult for me to make it, but it looks like I'm going to need to make an effort to get there!

Mental note: buy a tape measurer so I can take body measurements to compare a month from now and see the changes!

Trying something new--working out

2009-08-10T15:32:00.004-05:00

To be perfectly honest I've never been a person who did a workout routine. In my younger days I got enough exercise from my active life that it wasn't something I ever needed to think about and therefore I think I never really learned how to do it! In the last ten or fifteen years I've thought about exercise more and even had a few false-starts at trying a new workout routine, but doing it on my own when I'm completely clueless about what to do was never effective, I didn't get any results soon enough to motivate me to keep going, and I always ended up giving up before I got hooked on it.

Over the last year especially I've really wanted to get a good exercise routine, I want the feeling of being fit and confident in the way I look and frankly I also just want to be thinner and more attractive. But again, I'm clueless how to get there!

About a month, maybe six weeks, ago my sister started joining an exercise group that is mainly made up of people she went to high school with and they meet up in a local park 3 or 4 times a week and exercise with a guy they went to school with who is studying to become a personal trainer. He's a former Marine, has muscles on his muscles and definitely knows what he's doing it's just a matter of getting his license (or certificate?) so he can get a job doing that. In the meantime he's happily teaching them in the park for free. Now, I don't know about you but it's hard to pass up a free workout group led by a personal trainer for me, so after working out some scheduling issues I joined them for the first time last Friday.

It was actually kind of fun...there was a group of six women, and then the leader so we kind of giggled and gossiped our way through the workout which was about 90 minutes long. No one person is incredibly more fit than the rest of us, we all laugh about having to suck in our stomach in front of the trainer dude, etc. :) Some are older, some are younger, but by the end we're all a sweaty mess!

Last Friday we did 90 minutes of arms and boy were my arms BURNING before we were done, but the next day I was barely sore at all so I thought yay! Then Sunday I was more sore, and then today I can barely lift my arms to brush my hair or put makeup on my face!

So far in under six weeks my sister has lost 1" from each area of her body--I'd be thrilled with that result so I'm going to measure myself and not look at the scale at all. Which won't be hard since I'm a pro at ignoring that particular appliance anyway. :)

The group gets together Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Saturday mornings for an "intense" work out--I skipped the intense work out on Saturday! Tonight's session has been cancelled because there are tornado watches for the area at that time.

I'm committed to going on Wednesday and at least three times a week. I went on Saturday and bought my own yoga/workout mat and my own set of hand weights to use (I mooched and borrowed on Friday). Hubby is supportive of me going, and since the group meets in the park the kids can come with me and play with all the other people's kids in the playground that is right next to the pavillion where we meet. There's absolutely no built-in reason not to go (other than it hurts!) and I'm excited about the whole thing. Spending time with other women, making new friends, and exercising all at the same time. Just in case I woose out I'm going to blog about it here so I feel guilty peer pressure to continue! :)

Photo Cube Gift Project

2009-08-09T19:30:00.007-05:00

Grandma's parents in their wedding photo and one anniversary photo

Grandma and a man-friend (do you still call them boyfriends in their 80's)

Grandma & Grandpa in various anniversary photos taken before his death in 1991

Grandma's baby photo!

Grandma & Grandpa's wedding party and wedding photo

Grandma as a teenager

This weekend we celebrated Hubby's grandmother's 85th birthday. He originally wanted me to make her one scrapbook page with different photos from the various stages of her life, but to me there was just no way to capture all the stages in one page without it looking crazy-busy (which is probably the look he was going for lol). I ended up making a photo cube for her instead, but in the rush to get out the door to the party I didn't take a photo of the cube finished so I'm uploading the layouts from each of the 6 sides here to show you instead.

*The blogger photo upload tool is being a PITA, and it took me over an hour to get these loaded--sorry they're not in a more cohesive order but I give up!

Feeling a bit voyeuristic tonight

2009-07-30T19:34:00.002-05:00

My husband's grandmother is celebrating her 85th birthday next week, and they're throwing her a surprise birthday party. Now setting aside my concerns about us yelling SURPRISING and startling an 85 yr old woman...I love that they celebrate her birthday every year. The only problem is finding a gift to get her. By the time you're 85 years old you pretty much have everything you need and want and yet it feels appropriate to buy her a gift to tell her how much you appreciate her. So, each year we rack our brains and come up with something that I'm sure she stashes in a closet and forgets all about.

This year, however, my husband had a brilliant idea (or at least it seems brilliant at this point, we'll see I suppose) to pick up several of her old photo albums from her house and for me to make a scrapbook out of some of the old pictures.

So I've just spent most of the evening looking through another family's photo albums and scanning pictures into the computer so I can scrap them. If you think about it, photo albums can be kind of personal. After all they're a photographic record of our lives and of the things we value most in that life, and the memories we want to cherish later in our life.

I feel like I learned a lot about my husband's extended family by looking through these photos. I never met his grandfather, he died from alzheimer's the year before my husband and I met. I've heard stories about him, of course, and have pretty much surmised that while they all worship him as a larger than life figure who kind of defined the family and everyone around him--I'm pretty sure if I'd met him, I would not have liked him at all. I've kept that little tidbit to myself though. ;)

Some of the things I learned is that while in most families the keeper of the camera and photo albums usually is the woman of the house, the man of the house did so for them. And he was meticulous to a fault. Every single photo is labeled with everyone who is in the photo, where the photo was taken, a date, and if appropriate the reason for the gathering. There's none of the "now is this so and so, or so and so" that my family tends to go through when looking at old photos!

I can also tell you that my husband's grandmother had one of those love affairs they make movies about. You can see it in her eyes every time they're photographed together. She clearly thought the moon and stars had been hung by his own hands, and he clearly had hung them to see them shine brightly in her eyes. I can also tell you that my husband's grandmother was treated like a princess, but she was also expected to "stay in her place" as many from that era were.

I can also look through these photos and tell when my husband's grandfather started to feel the early stages of his alzheimer's. Since I also lost my grandpa to the disease, we've had countless conversations in our family looking back with hindsight about when he actually got sick, and how long we ignored it hoping it was something else.

There's a period of time in the albums where the photos are suddenly no longer meticulously taken and labeled. Their pattern is haphazard, and they're not marked with much at all. They're not tidy in the albums, and sometimes they're not even in the album in order.

Of course, as a parent I realize sometimes this happens just because you suddenly have too much going on to dedicate time to organizing photos. (ahem, if you open my closet right now you'll see a shoebox of photos from 10 yrs ago still waiting on an album...).

I love old photographs, don't you? I love to look at them, and picture the day and the playful banter between the photographer and the subject. Especially in those really old photos from the 40's and 50's, when having a camera was a huge luxury and taking a picture wasn't something one did casually. Each photograph means something and is meant to serve as a record for those of us in later generations. I'm so glad they took them and saved them for us. I hope I can do them justice with a scrapbook, I'll admit to feeling a little overwhelmed at the prospect and immensely relieved that I'm done peeling back the plastic and gently removing the photographs. I lived in fear one delicate picture would tear or crease or worse!

Had a fabulous time at Holiday World

2009-07-29T21:32:00.003-05:00

We had an absolutely fabulous time at Holiday World! If you're anywhere in the midwest, or near southern Indiana at all I completely recommend you check this great family oriented theme park out.

It's affordably priced---adult admission is $39 for a single day and children's admission is even less than that!

The park offers free soft drinks and free sunscreen to all the guests--so you're not spending any money for drinks while you're there!

The food is absolutely reasonably priced, we fed our entire family for about $16 each meal!

It's quite literally the cleanest public place I've ever visited--and that is NOT an exaggeration. In the 2 days we were there we never once saw a piece of trash on the ground, a spilled drink on a table or discarded food anywhere in the park. The bathrooms are spotless. The drink stations are immaculate. The second you get up from a table there's an employee there disinfecting and wiping down the table.

The park has every type of ride imaginable from no-nonsense roller coasters that have even the most adventurous spirit screaming at the top of their lungs to kiddie rides tame enough for the youngest of hearts, to water slides including the world's tallest water ride (which is a must-ride if you're there!).

If you're looking for an inexpensive family get-away make Holiday World your destination. It's a short 3 hour drive from St Louis, Indianapolis, Cincinnati, Nashville, and Paducah!

If you do plan a visit check out the fabulous camp grounds that are right outside the main gates of the park, it's a beautiful camp ground and very reasonably priced. If camping isn't your style there's Santa's Cottages that you can rent right in Santa Claus. The hotel scene is also only a short 20 minute drive to either Tell City or Jasper.

We have talked to so many people who make Holiday World an annual family tradition, and honestly I hope we do the same. The kids LOVED it, Hubby and I had a great time and the bang for the buck can't be beat.

It's official...I'm counting the days

2009-07-16T18:58:00.002-05:00

Well, I'm actually counting the days for two things--first a week from tomorrow (the 25th) we're leaving on a mini-vacation of sorts. It's a first for our little family, not by intention or design but just by happenstance really. Either we've lacked time or funds to take the kids on an official, stay at a hotel, do something planned, type of vacation. Our kids have only ever been on camping vacations, which are fun in their own way but not quite the same.

Hubby grew up taking a big family vacation every year. You know the kind--annual drive to Disney or somewhere huge and fun like that. But to him it's not a big deal to go or not to go.

I grew up with a dad who traveled a lot for work and had no interest in doing the whole road-trip thing on his 2 weeks off a year. We took very few vacations when I was a kid and I remember there was always a huge amount of anticipation waiting for the magic day--I also remember hating the drive but loving the destination and the adventure!

This year Hubby said "if you plan it, we'll go" so I planned a 3 day getaway to Holiday World in Indiana. Now it's not the great family adventure cross-country, and we definitely don't need to update our passports but the kids are SO excited and I have to admit so am I.

The other thing I'm officially counting the days down to is the first day of school--there are 33--I can seriously not stand the arguing and bickering between my kids anymore. I know my sister and I fought like cats and dogs at this age, but goodness they are driving me nuts.

Long Hot Days of Summer

2009-07-07T17:00:00.002-05:00

Remember when you were a kid and summer seemed to fly by in a blur of swimming and bike riding? Not so much when you're the mom. Partly because today times have changed and your kid can't take off on his or her bike for the whole day like I used to do when I was a kid. We've just passed the unofficial halfway point in summer vacation and I can promise you I am DONE trying to keep my kids entertained all day long. I half-heartedly joke that to them if I'm not throwing a circus in our backyard they're bored.

I try my best, really I do, but I'm not a naturally crafty person and it's hard for me to come up with ideas for them to do--especially since we are talking about a wide age range here. And, let's face it, like everyone else I'm holding the purse strings just a bit tighter these days than I have in days gone by.

I've actually been having a lot of fun--and success!--with the ideas on the 30 Days of Summer Giveaways board on ParentsConnect.com. We've done everything from made homemade ice cream in a plastic bag (that'll tire their arms out lemme tell ya!), to decorated their bicycles, to played "3 lies and a truth" ...and you have to like any community that lets you know it's the official day to celebrate chocolate (as if we need a reason...). I'm saving the things to do indoor ideas for the next rainy day--aren't rainy days the hardest days to keep the kids entertained??

Check it out if you're looking for summer fun ideas!

Swim Lessons

2009-06-22T17:47:00.003-05:00

Every summer I call around trying to find reasonably priced, and convenient swim lessons for my children. I'm of the belief that every child should have swim lessons for safety reasons if nothing else, but I also think swimming is not only fabulous exercise, it's one of the few athletic things that you do completely by yourself, as opposed to part of a team, etc so it's great for self confidence and muscle development.

When we were kids my sister and I didn't participate in any after school, extracurricular or other types of activities--no sports, no dance, nothing like that but my mother (who is afraid of the water...) insisted we have swim lessons every single summer. I took so many lessons that I was passing the life saving tests to become a lifeguard before I was technically old enough to take them. You'd assume I'd go on to become a lifeguard but as life happens, by the time I was old enough, I'd completely lost interest. Ahhh, the joys of being a teen. :)

Anyway, every year when I call around I am completely flabbergasted at the prices for the lessons (our local YMCA charges $67 per child for lessons 2x a week for 4-5 weeks!). Maddy took really casual lessons at a local health club a few years ago so she knows the basics, but honestly she spends most of her time in the water doing somersaults, hand stands, and various dance moves rather than dancing. Nicholas has never had any lessons, and while he can swim like a fish under water, he doesn't know even the most basic fundamentals. This year as I was again beyond flabbergasted with the options left to me for swimming lessons--a friend suggested I find someone to give lessons in our pool. An option that never even occured to me before! Problem--I don't know any lifeguards, or anyone who gives lessons so the search was on. I started asking friends with teenagers if their friends worked as lifeguards, I asked Maddy's BFF if her brother (who is 18) had any lifeguard friends and SCORE he did!

He came by today for their first lesson--he's going to come twice a week for as long as we want and teach both kids at the same time for such a ridiculously low price Hubby and I have already decided we're going to give him extra to make it more worth his while!

In an hour he had Nicholas swimming around the pool, and Maddy doing underwater turns, the breast stroke & back stroke. They were both T-I-R-E-D when the lesson was over--which let's face it is what every mom dreams of right?

Yay--I'm so pleased with this arrangement!!

A wedding etiquette tip from me to the brides-to-be

2009-06-21T18:15:00.004-05:00

I'm not an etiquette expert, but I'm going to share a tip with all the brides-to-be out there in the blogsphere. Do not plan your wedding for outdoors, at the end of June, if you live in St Louis. In case you haven't noticed--it's hot & humid here in the summer and your guests do not want to put on their best clothes so they can sit in the sun and melt into a puddle of sweat and makeup while you say your vows.

Donnie's cousin got married yesterday at a beautiful outdoor location--seriously BEAUTIFUL doesn't begin to capture how incredibly gorgeous this place was. The spot they put the altar and chairs for the guests was dead in the sun. Not a single chair was in the shade. The poor groomsen in their tuxedos looked beyond miserable. The bridesmaids--in their black dresses--were trying to discreetly wipe sweat off their face and necks during the ceremony. The bride was seen after the wedding lifting the back of her gown towards a fan in a desperate attempt to get some air under her heavy skirt.

I mean--who thought this would be a good idea?? The actual temp yesterday was about 95*, with the heat index it was 110*.

The wedding programs were fans, and the ushers passed out bottled water as they seated you. So clearly some thought to the weather had been given, but not enough to think "eh, maybe air conditioning isn't so much a luxury as a necessity?"

So, my tip to all the potential brides-to-be out there is...don't forget to consider the comfort of your guests when you are choosing your location and your date.

My (formerly) shy little man

2009-06-17T20:56:00.003-05:00

The kids are going to VBS this week at my parents church--they love it, I love that they love it--hate the constant running back and forth involved in getting them there and picking them up. :)

As further proof that Nicholas is continuing to grow and come out of his shyness shell, today as we were leaving the church parking lot--picture a scene of pure chaos, kids and parents hustling this way and that, it's a scorching 95* outside, everyone's rushing to the car a/c etc--Nicholas is happily walking a couple of steps behind me and every now and then I'd hear him shout out "Bye Jake" or "Bye Harrison" and then he'd tell me "Mom, that was Jake, he's in my class...".

These are the types of moments that for most parents go without notice--I know because for Maddy I wouldn't have batted an eye or even taken notice of her quickly making friends and yelling out across a busy parking lot to connect with them one last time before heading home! But when your child has been shy, has been that child that literally clung to your pant leg and hid behind you whenever someone new spoke to them. When you've seen the cost that comes with, the things they miss out enjoying because they can't gather up the courage to try them. And then you see them burst from that shell and form friendships in just two or three days with kids their own age--well, let's just say I called Hubby from the car and gave him a play-by-play!

Recent funnies overheard in my home

2009-06-12T10:41:00.002-05:00

Nicholas: Mom I know how you make milk
Me: Oh? (half listening as I pour him a glass of milk)
Nicholas: Yep, you pull on a cow
Me: (hiding a smile) Well, yes I guess that's technically correct but there's more to it...
Nicholas: (full of 6 yr old wisdom) oh yeah I know that...

At Nicholas's birthday party last Sunday hubby and I invited some friends we used to be super close to but they moved away a couple of years back and we kind of lost touch. We recently found them again through Facebook and it turns out they're living closer now (though still a drive away) so we invited them to come to the party. They have a son who is a few months older than Nicholas, his name is Dalton.

As my sister-in-law was telling everyone goodbye the boys were all in the hot tub (because the pool was chilly enough their lips were turning blue!)

Dalton: Hi, my name is Dalton...I don't actaully know him...I just came here 'cause I knew there was going to be a pool AND a hot tub!

2009-06-11T19:45:00.003-05:00

I haven't taken time to digiscrap in ages--seriously AGES! I have so many pictures I've taken lately between her dance recital and school functions and Nicholas's birthday last week--it's ridiculous! I stole the idea for this page off someone I saw on Facebook--I don't even know the person but I saw it in someone's friends feed and thought oooh I'm gonna do that, too! lol

The papers, elements, etc (everything) in the second one are from Miss Mint's Kindergarten kit, the first one is using paper from Retrodiva's Walk in the Park and the frame is from Verena Karolyi Designs Spring Awakenings frames

Insanely Busy

2009-06-03T18:33:00.002-05:00

As always the last week of May and first week of June are c-r-a-z-y busy at our house. Between all the events they try to cram into the last few weeks of school, having to make a decision about whether or not to advance Nicholas into First Grade or retain him in Kindergarten, picking up dance costumes, having my mother alter them, having the final week of rehearsals for the dance recital then pictures, dress rehearsal and the actual recital oh and then just for the proverbial cherry on top--Nicholas's birthday is the 8th.

I mean--that's a long sentence right? Try living it! :)

You know it's a bad sign when you forget your own age

2009-05-26T17:34:00.003-05:00

Hubby celebrated a birthday this past weekend, and I have a hilarious story to share that I think everyone over the age of 30 can relate to. Last weekend we were talking about his birthday, and what he'd like to do given the fact that almost everyone in our circle of friends and family was either out of town, attending a wedding, or already busy for most of the entire 3-day weekend. Mind you this is one of those typical husband wife conversations we have where he was in the shower, and I was at the sink brushing my teeth or something.

At one point in the conversation I asked him if he was turning 37 or 38 this year. He answered that he was turning 38 and I'm not sure that the written word can properly express how utterly dejected he sounded at the prospect. I paused a moment, did a little mental math (i.e. took my age, subtracted 3.5 years and came up with a different number) and said "are you sure? what year were you born again?"

Long story short--I informed him he was in fact turning 37 this year. He FLUNG open the shower curtain and demanded "are you sure? are you sure? do the math, do the math"! Then for the next week he kept asking me if I was sure--until I finally said either believe me, or call your mother! :)

He told everyone we saw all weekend that my gift to him this year was "a whole extra year" because he gets to do his 37th year over again! (actually his gift was an iPod Nano but I like his story, too)

The whirlwind known as "May" continues

2009-05-13T19:17:00.002-05:00

I really hate the last month of school, and really I'm the type of mom who volunteers--over volunteers even--for all the events at school but this is too much even for me! Our school district is one of those where things that are traditions must continue purely because they are traditional--and I really hate that.

So far this month both kids have had a field trip, the entire district visited our school to have Field Day for 4-6th graders (K-3 had the day off). Still to come we have the entire district off school to walk in a parade across town, culminating in a "picnic" which is really more of a carnival where kids have to buy tickets for rides, games, food & drinks--in a teeny tiny park that makes me feel claustrophobic with thousands of kids (mostly unchaperoned) running around.

Basically we go from April to June before I've had time to realize it was time to change the calendar page and then...it's the entire summer home with the kiddos.

...and then we're supposed to make a decision

2009-05-10T20:59:00.003-05:00

And by "we' I clearly mean "me" since I married a man incapable of decisions.

Friday we had our final parent/teacher conference with Nicholas's kindergarten teacher to decide whether we want to send him on to first grade next year or retain him in kindergarten for a second year. The subject first came up in our very first parent/teacher conference back in October where she was already expressing concerns and recommending "retention".

I've literally struggled with this decision the entire school year. Tossed and turned nights. Researched the subject and asked for advice from both friends and other faculty at the school. There have been nights I've woken up in the middle of the night and immediately this thought is on my mind and I'm unable to go back to sleep. There have been times I've watched him play during the year and made a decision one way or the other, only to second-guess myself minutes later.

I was hoping at the conference she'd give me information that would make the decision so black and white I couldn't possibly make the wrong choice or doubt myself later.

The problem you see is that I do not have a crystal ball. The problem is that no matter which choice I make I'm going to always wonder if I've made the wrong one because the simple truth is I won't ever have a moment where I can point to it and say "see look there, we made the right choice!".

In the end he tests at average or above average on every one of the skills she evaluated him on and she still has concerns that it's his maturity level, not his intelligence, his skill level or anything else that would benefit from retaining him in kindergarten.

I agree with her on that point--I think. It's as if only the last 3 months or so he's really engaged in class, excited about learning and eager for more. I see in him now traits that Maddy expressed at the very beginning of her kindergarten experience. But when I ask Hubby what he think we should do he just shrugs and says he doesn't know--which as we all know with men is code for don't want to talk about it now. At dinner Friday night Nicholas asked us what the teacher wanted to talk to us about, and since I try very hard never to lie to my kids I told him in a short, kind of vague answer and Nicholas immediately said no he wants to go to first grade with his friends.

*sigh*

Calgon take me away.

Long Live the Beauty Queen

2009-05-03T21:23:00.002-05:00

Maddy had her "meet the cast" party tonight for the musical she's going to be in this summer. There was lots of information shared, paperwork passed around, schedules assigned--you get the picture.

One detail jumped out at me. At the bottom of every piece of paper was the Director's name, she's also the founder of the organization that sponsors the show since it's a fundraiser for children's cancer research, below her name was a title that both amused and bewildered me. "Miss O'Fallon 2002".

Seven years ago she was a beauty contest winner and she still lists the title under her name on documents?

Don't get me wrong, the woman--or maybe I should call her girl since she's a whopping 24 years old (ha ha)--is perfectly lovely, very outgoing, very good with all the kids, and a great person to be organizing such an event as this. It's just that the title kinda threw me...?

A little out of balance

2009-04-29T20:45:00.002-05:00

I've rambled about this subject before, it's a popular theme with me. To me, being a parent is a daily struggle between trying to be the absolute best mother that I can be, and not completely losing my own identity to being "just mom".

A little history, there was a time in my past when I didn't think I wanted to have kids. Surprising, right? Those of you who know me now know me as this woman who really, really wants to be supermom. There's a reason for that, part of the reason I wasn't sure if I wanted to have kids is because I wasn't completely confident that I could be good enough at it. The idea of being a bad mother, of not doing an absolutely fabulous job completely terrified me. Terrified me almost as much as the concept of losing my own identity and being only "the mom".

What can I say, I'm a Libra, I like balance.

Lately I've been feeling that the scales are tipping towards that "just a mom" side of things so I've been trying to think of things that I can do that are more for me than for the rest of the household. That's a hard thing to do really, if you think about it that's probably why the scales get tipped in the other direction in the first place if I can't even think of things to do for myself the likelihood that I'm going to do them on a regular basis aren't too likely.

Today I had an idea though. When Nicholas was young, we're talking really young, I joined RWA as kind of a positive affirmation to myself that I really was going to keep writing. Through the local chapter that I joined I met a few friends, and we ended up forming a small writing critique group. Once a week we got together, and shared our work with one another. Eventually it got really difficult for me to get out of the house in the evenings, with Hubby's schedule and the kids not always going to bed on time, etc so those regular meetings became more sporadic. The one friend I was probably closest with didn't have any children, but insisted she couldn't come to my house for the meetings because she couldn't leave her dogs home alone at night after being home all day while she was at work (no I didn't get it either).

Anyway, long story short, I'm going to talk to Hubby about rejoining RWA, and do the Online chapter this time so there's no meetings to attend it's all done online, and I'm going to try and reconnect with the women in the local writer's group I was friendly with.

Now I know you're probably thinking why does she have to talk to Hubby about joining a group? Well, I just checked and the dues have gone up...a lot. What I remembered as $75 a year is now $125 for the national group and $25 for the online group. Yowza!

That will be a nice relaxing Saturday...NOT

2009-04-27T20:27:00.003-05:00

Maddy's dance recital is rapidly approaching. For Maddy this is the day she looks forward all year long with excitement and anticipation. It's all about finally getting to wear the costumes she's been waiting to wear for months, about finally showing off the routines she's spent 9 months learning, and about having friends and family come watch her strut her stuff and show what she's learned.

Recital day is insanely hectic and stressful for me as the mom. While she doesn't get nervous at all I make myself crazy worrying that her hair is going to fall out of whatever assigned hairstyle she is supposed to wear that day. I worry that she's going to go out on stage with her costume tucked in her tights. I worry that she'll slip and fall, forget her routine, or a million other crazy things I can't even list here now. Plus, there's the running up and down the stairs to the dressing room for costume changes--this year there will be three of those--keeping track of where they are in the program so she's backstage when she's supposed to be, trying to take pictures and video etc.

Well, for just a smidge of added fun today they posted the recital schedules. Her dance studio is pretty big, and actually has two separate locations that combine to do the recital over the course of three days--5 shows. All year long I've been saying in the back of my mind--you just watch, her two separate classes will not be assigned to recital on the same day, and we're going to have to sit through the three hour recital two days in a row. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy most of the show--but that's a long time to sit in a dark theater and watch other people's kids dance, ya know? So, with dread and anticipation I check the schedule. Ballet/Jazz recital is on Saturday, June 6th at 6 pm. The Pom Pon class is not on the list. GRREEEAAAAT. So I scan the 5 other sheets of paper looking for her class and finally find it on the sheet for Saturday, June 6th at 1 pm.

That's right--two separate recitals on the same day which will undoubtedly amount to about 6 hours of dance recital in one day. Three costume changes. Two different hairstyles.

Oh and did I mention that recital weekend always falls on the same weekend as Nicholas's birthday? So Saturday will be a non-stop 24/7 recital marathon and then Sunday I'll get to throw a birthday party for a six year old.

Holy cow I'm tired just thinking about it and it's a month away.

The unofficial start of summer

2009-04-26T19:15:00.002-05:00

It seems like the last few weeks we are getting started on our unofficial start to summer. You know--running kids here, there, and everywhere on the weekends and after school, this kid has a field trip this week, the other kid has a field trip next week, school is closed for Field Day, school is closed for the annual parade/picnic. Before we even have time to realize it, the kids will be on summer break and the weeks will be flying past.

Last week was super hectic, Maddy had a make-up dance class for one we missed back in November, and she auditioned for a musical on Sunday. So instead of just driving to the dance studio (which is a 20 minute one-way drive) I drove there on Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday! (she got accepted in the show by the way, more on that later)

Nicholas has started playing soccer again, he really loves it but that takes up our Saturday mornings for the next month.

Today was nice, for once we actually had nothing planned outside of watching the race on TV. We ran to the grocery store this morning, made some snacks, Hubby lit the grill and made salmon and chicken wings on the grill. We all ate too much, played in the sun (the kids even ran through the sprinkler it was so warm) and I have that lovely sun-kissed feeling on my cheeks and nose this evening.

Feels like summer!

I think this is where I started

2009-04-20T20:33:00.002-05:00

I'm really itching for something new to read lately, so while Maddy was at dance class tonight I ran to Border's to pick up a new book, or two, or ten. None of my favorite authors have any books out I haven't already read, so I checked the computers hoping there was something coming out in the next week or so I could pre-order. None of them are releasing new titles until September. Honestly, I don't know if I can last till September without something new to read. That's all summer! I need stuff to read pool side!!

As I was leaving the store, sadly empty handed, I realized--this is exactly what prompted me to start writing several years ago. Basically I had nothing to read, so I picked up some random title at the book store by an author I'd never read but the back cover blurb sounded promising. The book was horrible. I mean truly, truly horrible. Made me want to throw it across the room and shout I CAN DO BETTER THAN THAT AND I WANT MY MONEY BACK.

And it occured to me, that if I could do better than that and this woman was getting published then why wasn't I doing it?

This week I ran into a number of former colleagues on Facebook from the job I was working when I was writing all the time. Basically I had this really boring, but well paying, job that allowed me to work all day and write at the same time. It was a beautiful thing. One of these coworkers immediately asked me if I still had copies of the books I was writing back then because she'd love to read them. I had completely forgotten that I had let her read them, because I didn't show them to many people at all. When I told her I'm sure I have a copy saved somewhere but I haven't looked at them, or even for them, in ages she was amazed and said "you should definitely pursue that, they were great!". Honestly, nobody has said that about my writing in a long time so it felt amazing to hear it again. It also reminded me that the whole reason I started writing and submitting to publishers was because I wanted to show my daughter that it's important to pursue your dreams, since I still believe that it makes me really want to find a way to have some time, and energy to work on stories again.

A busy weekend

2009-04-19T20:06:00.002-05:00

Yesterday was Nicholas's first soccer game of the year. He played last year, or actually attended what amounted to a workshop put on by the YMCA over the course of 6-8 weeks in the fall. By the last game the kids were playing in full winter coats, hats, gloves, etc and still freezing--and they at least got to run around. He was sooo excited to play again, but he kept asking right up until it was time to leave for the game if it was going to be cold at soccer again.

There were a ton more kids on the team, actually there were four teams there and they not only did some drills they played an actual 30 minute game (without keeping score). Most of the kids were pretty clueless, and there was so much commotion from the sidelines where the parents were watching many of the kids were so distracted it was comical.

The goalie on the other team had to stop and pick her wedgie everytime she picked up the ball. I was laughing so hard I had tears in my eyes.

Several times the cheers from the sidelines sounded a lot like people yelling "no, the other way! Other way!"

And then there was this one little boy who was HARD CORE soccer! He dove for the ball, kicked it while in mid-air, and more importantly got righteously pissed off when anyone from either team took the ball away from him. So pissed off, in fact that he started smacking the other kids! One kid got smacked right across the face! What did the parents of this smacker do? Yelled from the sidelines and said "Jonathan, we told you to keep your hands off other kids while we were here". Um, so this has happened before, or at least was not completely unexpected. They did send Jonathan out to apologize to the boy he smacked--only that little boy literally turned and RAN across the field as fast as he could to get away from Jonathan, probably sending another smack was coming his way.

This wasn't the last smack either!

In other news, Maddy had her auditions today. There were only about a dozen kids there, most of them auditioning for singing and dancing parts but there are several people who had called to schedule auditions for next weekend because they weren't available today. There were kids there who had to leave early so they could be in St Louis--where they appear in professional shows at The Muny, shows like Annie, and Meet Me In St Louis. Holy cow my kid is auditioning against these kids? Kids who have had 10 and more years of experience dancing. I started to get really nervous. The owner of the dance studio was there though, her daughter is auditioning, and she seemed confident Maddy would get a part and said that it will be a great experience for her and a great first show for her to be in.

Keep your fingers crossed--we'll get a letter in the mail to notify us if she got the part or not.

Here we go again?

2009-04-16T20:40:00.002-05:00

Tonight at the dance studio Maddy spotted a flyer for auditions from a local organization that puts on an annual musical with the proceeds going to research for pediatric cancers. It's a great cause, and I was intrigued by the concept of a kids production to benefit kids with cancer. According to the flyer she's supposed to prepare 1 minute of dance routine that showcases her best abilities, and then they'll teach choreography in groups and judge their performances.

I immediately thought oh no, here we go again. This is the first thing she's wanted to audition for since the Dance Team auditions late last year and that did NOT go well. So I grabbed the flyer, sent her on into dance class and then pumped the receptionist for information. My first concern was who runs this organization, the auditions are held at the dance studio and I totally trust the owner of the studio so if she was involved I felt pretty comfortable but if it's a group of icky strangers--sorry, my kid is busy that day. The owner isn't affiliated but the owner's daughter is in the group--which is almost as good I suppose. Apparently a lot of girls from the dance studio participate in this group, it's their 7th annual benefit and they have always used the dance studio for rehearsals and auditions. She's not sure what the competition level is at the auditions, she thinks that last year they took everyone who tried out but then "they went in different directions and things" (no I don't know what that means either).

So on the way home from dance class we had a heart to heart--she really, really wants to do it, she thinks a summer filled with dance rehearsals and even being in what basically sounds like a musical play sounds like more fun than she could stand. So I just explained in my best Mommy voice that we'll happily go to auditions and that I have no doubt she can be the best person there but that she should keep an open mind and if they don't pick her that's their loss, just shrug and go on. I got "yeah, yeah I know, I know I think it sounds fun!"

Oy vey.

Then we get home and she decides to practice her ballet recital routine and pick 60 seconds of the song to do at the auditions--which by the way are THIS Sunday so not much time to prepare. Since they are really just getting into heavy recital rehearsal mode (recital is the first weekend in June) and she's used to doing that routine as part of a group of about 15 girls it's difficult for her to remember the choreography in the living room. She gets frustrated, which leads to foot stomping and watery eyes and honestly it's like teaching the child to write her name all over again. "You can do this Maddy, I know you can do this just relax and stop getting so frustrated".

Remembering choreography is probably one of the skills she needs to work on, but then what do I know maybe this is totally age appropriate for a 10 yr old girl? I wish I knew more about it so I knew how to judge her skill level and knew whether to encourage her or let it just remain something fun she does as a hobby and gets great exercise doing. I wish I knew lots of things though so that's just part of a very long list.

Wish us luck, or tell us to break a leg or whatever they say in the theater!

(High School Musical makes this all look so easy...I blame Sharpay for all this drama I have to deal with. LOL)

No sick days for moms

2009-04-15T20:44:00.003-05:00

Yesterday morning when I woke up the first conscious thought I had was that I needed to call the doctor and beg for an appointment.

I've been married for 15 years, and with Hubby for 2 years before that, this was the first time since I've known him that I've called and made an appointment at the doctor because I was sick.

The only available appointment time was 4:45 pm, on the night hubby is out of town for work, which means I had to take both kids with me to the appointment. I said sure, I'll be there.

Diagnosis, upper respiratory infection. I came home armed with a prescription for a nasal spray, antibiotics, and otc sudafed extended release.

Today I feel slightly better and still feel like hammered shit so that tells you how bad I felt yesterday, right?

I'm going to put a list together of the Mom's Laws--they're like murphy's law but only for mom's, and the list definitely includes if you're sick it will definitely happen on the day there's no one to help you with the kids.

You have to admire that type of persistence

2009-04-13T19:11:00.003-05:00

If you happened to stop by my house any evening around 7 pm you would hear the following conversation.

Nicholas (from the tub) Mom, do I have to wash my hair?
Me-Yes, Nicholas you have to wash your hair.
Nicholas-But I don't want to wash my hair tonight.
Me-We have to wash it anyway.
Nicholas-But we washed my hair last night.
Me-We wash your hair every night.

The amazing thing is that he asks this question every single night without fail, and I have never in his 5+ years of life ever told him "okay, tonight we will skip washing your hair and let you go around with stink head" and yet he continues to ask in the hopes that someday Mommy will say it's ok to skip washing your hair!

Finding a Balance

2009-04-10T18:23:00.002-05:00

For me holidays are about finding a balance. Balance between my family's traditions from when I was a child, Hubby's traditions from when he was a child, and new things we want to try or add as our own family's traditions.

As a kid my Dad bought my sister and myself a chocolate Easter bunny every year for Easter. It was in our basket, but we always knew--even as very, very young children--that the chocolate bunny was from Dad, and not from the Easter Bunny. It was only as an adult that I discovered this was a tradition carried down from my Dad's grandfather. When my kids were young I started always putting a chocolate bunny in their baskets--but the sad fact was they didn't really care about the chocolate bunny and they didn't really want to eat it. My dad still buys them a chocolate bunny for Easter and it's from him--it's special because it comes from him but if we're being honest more often than not I'm the one who ends up eating them. :)

Hubby's family traditions are more along the lines of ham for dinner, potato salad, and jell-o as part of the meal. I respect his traditions but honestly ham, potato salad and jell-o are on the lsit of foods I really wouldn't care if I never had served to me again. I want a holiday meal to be special not something I might have on a picnic.

A few years ago Hubby's mother joined my family for a meal--I think it was Thanksgiving, and my aunt had made rolls. First, my mother in law was flat out in awe that a regular person could make BREAD. Seriously we heard about it for weeks! The next holiday that came around I made the rolls. I'm not at all exaggerating when I tell you that the entire in-law family grilled me through the whole meal. It was as if I had rolled back the stone and found the tomb empty!

Now those rolls are a holiday tradition in Hubby's family.

Fast forward a few years and I made a salad for a family meal.

Now that salad is a part of every holiday meal at Hubby's family.

Now don't get me wrong, I love both these recipes but I don't want to make them for every single holiday. I like to try new recipes out on holidays and mix them with the tried-and-true family favorites. To me holidays are a time to stretch a little, maybe show off a new recipe or fancy new dessert. Frankly, the in-laws are not impressed by my fancy new recipes. In fact I think the only thing I've ever made that impressed them was bread. Seriously they're in awe of the magical powers over yeast. :)

So we're going to his mother's for dinner tomorrow night and I just finished mixing up the rolls to let them raise overnight in the fridge. The rest of the meal includes--the salad recipe (above) now made by my sister-in-law because she doesn't cook and loves this salad--ham, potato salad, jello salad, and my mother-in-law's idea of a chocolate pie (purchase a graham cracker crust pie shell, mix jell-o brand chocolate pudding and pour into pie shell, chill, top with Cool Whip...I can hear your oohs and aaahs now).

Refrigerator Rolls

1 Cup Boiling Water
1 Cup Shortening
1 Cup Sugar
1 1/2 Teaspoons Salt
2 Eggs, beaten
2 Packages Dry Yeast
1 Cup Warm Water
6 Cups Flour

Combine boiling water, shortening, sugar and salt. Blend and cool. Add eggs. Sprinkle yeast into warm water, stir until dissolved. Combine with egg miture. blend in flour; cover and refrigerate 4 hours. Dough should be in a large bowl as it will rise slightly in the refrigerator. Dough will keep in the refrigerator up to 10 days and may be used as needed.

Form desired size rolls (I like to make clover leaf rolls and bake in a muffin pan), let raise 1 hour in a warm space, bake until lightly brown.

Cutest Grin

2009-04-09T21:22:00.003-05:00

Okay can I just say that if you're accustomed to seeing things as cute as the picture I'm about to post I want to come to your house and hang out with you everyday because I am jealous of how much time you're spending around cute stuff! Nicholas has lost three teeth in the last few weeks, adding those missing three to the two upper teeth he knocked out when he was 2 yrs old--he's basically toothless. If he doesn't start growing some big boy teeth soon he's going to have to start living on a liquid diet or something.

All papers and elements from Peppermint Creative's Kindergarten Crafts kit.

The inevitable mandatory "invitation" from the in-laws

2009-04-06T19:01:00.002-05:00

Everytime there's a holiday Hubby and I try to find the balance between his family and mine, and after almost 16 years we still haven't found an arrangement that makes everyone happy. Last year we started working towards a new goal, if we can't make all of them happy we were just going to aim for making ourselves happy and well frankly screw everybody else. :)

His mother generally makes plans weeks and weeks sometimes even months in advance. My family on the other hand never thinks about making plans until last minute, and then my mom is pissed because we always have plans. His dad never makes plans of any sort but sometimes calls at the absolutely last possible minute and acts put out that we haven't included him in our plans.

About a week and a half ago I realized that neither family had made any sort of plans, we hadn't received any phone calls and no plans had been made from any of the families. A plan began to form--we decided if none of them were making plans we weren't going to call and ask for arrangements, we'd just make our own for just the four of us. I'd make dinner, we'd make Easter baskets, hide eggs, etc and have a perfectly relaxing holiday with just us and the kids. We were excited, it sounded perfect!

Then yesterday my cell phone rang and it was his mother. Not the house phone, not his cell phone, my cell phone. This was our conversation:

"Hi, I was calling to see what your plans were with your family because it doesn't make any difference to me whether I make Easter dinner on Saturday or Sunday."

"I haven't made any plans with my family yet, we hadn't heard from either of you so we made our own plans to have our own Easter here with just the four of us."

"Okay, so I'll make dinner on Saturday then. I'll go and get a ham, do you eat ham?"

"No, I don't eat ham but that's fine because everyone else does so feel free to make a ham." (note: we have this portion of the conversation every time there's a holiday--I do not like pork, I don't eat pork, I've never eaten pork in her presence and yet she asks me every single time)

"Okay so I'll make a ham, and just let me know what dishes you'd like to bring and we'll see you Saturday at 5 pm"

Please note there was no question mark anywhere in that conversation, there was no invitation, this was "I'm cooking, you'll be here at 5 pm".

So clearly our plans have backfired, and now when my mother hears that we're going to his mother's house, we'll have to make plans to go to my parents house and that will be the end of our holiday with just the four of us.

Time for a change?

2009-04-05T18:46:00.002-05:00

An old friend who I used to write with years ago popped up in email today for her semi-annual "so are you writing" question, to which I always reply "no, not lately there just isn't any time". It's the same conversation we've had off and on for five years, since my son was born and I started working from home. Her email aggravated me, as it always does, and I resent her implied pity when she says "I'm sorry to hear that" but it got me thinking...maybe it's time to let the whole thing go starting with a new name for this blog. I mean if I'm not really writing, maybe the whole thing needs to get a redo?

A true blue food nerd

2009-04-04T21:48:00.002-05:00

In case you should ever doubt what a true blue food/kitchen gadget nerd I really am, let this post be your reminder. A brief summary of my day: up at 7 am, showered and dressed and at wal-mart by 8 am, plumber at the house by 9:30 to fix an outdoor faucet, picked Maddy up from her sleepover at 10 am, picked her fundraiser up in the next town over at 10:30, dropped Nicholas off at my parents at 11, came home and delivered all the fundraiser stuff. By noon I was on the deck staining it with the help of a friend (hubby went to her house to fix her front steps for her). Finished staining the deck at 5, went to a friends house for a BBQ.

And yeah those are just the highlights! It was a BUSY Saturday to say the least. And yet, what am I here to blog about? The uber excitement I have over this fabulous new Pyrex baking set I scored at Target for $36!! As we speak it's all unpacked and displayed on the kitchen table...I can't wait to wash it and put it in the cabinets all pretty and ready to use!

See...I told you, nerd!

Mushy and sentimental

2009-04-02T20:15:00.002-05:00

Like most of America I'm sitting in front of my television set right now watching the final episode of ER. I actually stopped watching the show years ago, when the last of the original regulars left, but sitting here watching the recap that aired before the last episode I found myself doing the thing I always do whenever a show I enjoy or even enjoyed in the past tense goes off the air. Sniffling and getting choked up. Crazy right? Except, it's not really, not if you think about it like this.

When ER was on the air this is a basic snapshot of what my life was like: I was a newlywed, living in a sprasely furnished townhouse apartment, working at a jewelry store with my new husband and we were both shiny and new, and full of doe eyed optimism. We were going to buy a house. We were going to have babies. We were going to be deliriously happy every single day of our blissfully happy lives.

When ER was on, Hubby was not allowed to speak to me unless it was on a commercial break. This was before DVR's, there was no pause button, there was no auto-timer that would recover your shows if you weren't home. I was ALWAYS home on Thursday nights--if you missed an episode of ER you were devastated--and it was all anyone talked about on Fridays. And if we're being completely honest here, and why not it's just my blog and none of you are going to rat me out right, it was young George Clooney who was almost as dreamy as older George Clooney!

If I'm going to continue in this honesty theme, part of what chokes me up watching the finale isn't just that the show is ending and the characters I've loved are disappearing, it's the realization that I probably didn't really stop watching it just because Dr. Greene died, and all the other regular characters splintered off to have fabulous movie careers or work on other television shows it was probably mostly due to the fact that I had children and could no longer devote the "me time" to watching an hour long television program.

The same snapshot of my life today would look quite different, testament to the fact that things do change in real life in 15 years. Some of that shiny optimism is worn away. Most of those friends I so eagerly called on Friday mornings to say "did you see ER??" are no longer in my life.

So I guess the real story here isn't being mushy and sentimental about a silly television show so much as it is being silly and sentimental about being 15 years older, 15 years wiser, 15 years more tired.

Smelly & Moldy

2009-04-01T21:04:00.002-05:00

Hubby pointed out to me the other night that my little bookshelf was overflowing, literally. There were piles of books on top of the shelf, falling off onto the floor in front of it, and actually several of the shelves had books two-deep. Since re-reading a book, or hanging onto it because it was so good you MIGHT read it again, or pass it on to friends & family is a concept completely unfamiliar to Hubby he really doesn't understand why books aren't like magazines and you read them, pass them on or toss them! He doesn't understand that my friends--the characters--live in those books and I can't stand to toss them out sometimes.

Well, upon closer examination I realized I really did have a lot of books on the shelf I had no sentimental attachment to and just hadn't bothered to get rid of. Several of them from the days when I was writing book reviews--after I wrote a review I was required to retain the ARC (advance reading copy) until the review appeared in print in case the author would want to dispute my comments. Some of those books were by authors I had become friends with, some were autographed copies and of course I want to keep those--others were from perfectly ordinary books by authors I don't give a rat's behinda about and had simply gotten buried on the shelf. So, I dutifully cleared off the bookshelf and filled a good size box with books to get rid of.

Now what to do with them? Even if I didn't like the book I can't stand the idea of throwing them in the trash. Does Goodwill take books as a donation? I don't know! And then it occurred to me that the local library would probably love mint condition books like these--some even with autographs inside the cover. So I called. This is the conversation that followed:

"Public Library"

"Yes, do you accept donations of books"

"As long as they're not all moldy and smelly..."

Honestly there was more after that but I was laughing too hard to hear the poor girl anymore.

A busy week with lots of furniture re-arranging

2009-03-29T20:00:00.005-05:00

It's been a crazy hectic week that began on Tuesday when the old refrigerator actually wheezed its last. While we'd been expecting it to come soon, we were hoping it would come on a day that was more convenient--hah. Instead we end up going to pick up the refrigerator in a torrential downpour and a job that Hubby figured would take maybe 10 minutes, took more like 4 hours because the new fridge is not only nicer, it's bigger and wouldn't fit through any doorways in our house. :) Fun stuff.

Then on Wednesday I made good on the second half of our annual tax-return deal and let Hubby buy the TV he's been wishing for forever. I swear my husband and TV's are like the cliche' about women and shoes, you can never have too many. It feels like every 6 months he's TV shopping again and now I realize that's probably partly my fault because I've been reluctant to give in to the pull of the big TV because our living room isn't a large room and I was afraid the TV would overpower the entire room. We have friends who have done this and frankly their television makes me a little claustrophobic! But I finally realized the only way stop this cycle was to tell him to decide what he really wanted, pick it out and we'd see if we could afford it or needed to save up for it. So he picked out a set, which required a new entertainment center and guess what...the new combination actually takes up a lot LESS space in the room than any combination we've had in our 16 years together! Who knew? Okay, so he knew but that doesn't count does it? No, I didn't think so.

But, the catch to my sudden willingness to buy the big TV was that my living room has needed painted for 3 years. No exaggeration, 3 years! We've literally painted every single room in the house in those years, except the living room. And no, I don't need his help to paint--he actually sucks at it--the furniture is so heavy I cannot possibly move it at all by myself. The couch, a sectional, has a hide-a-bed in one end, and two recliners in the other end. So before I'd agree to buy the television and the entertainment center, I held it all ransom for his furniture moving abilities. Yay me! :)

Yeah, yeah, yeah you can totally tell I was watching House when I took these pictures...LOL

A small rant--AKA I must be old and married now

2009-03-26T13:16:00.003-05:00

We've received three wedding invitations in the last few weeks, one from one of Hubby's female cousins. Traditional wedding invitation, traditional shower invitation, no complaints from me.

Second invitation from a long-time friend of Hubby's, more of a card playing buddy than anything, we see them maybe 2-3 times a year max and honestly the wife-to-be and their two kids drive me batty. They've been living together for over 10 years, they have two children together, they own a home together. Last summer they split up for a few weeks and he told everyone who would listen that "the way he got back into the house was to buy her a ring". So after 10 years, two children, and a mortage getting married meant nothing more to him than a way to get back into his own house when she gave him the heave-ho. Their invitation arrived with a little slip of paper letting us know they've registered at both JcPenney and Pampered Chef--oh did I mention she sells pampered chef? and the link to order off their registry is to her own personal website, so she'll earn a commission off each item ordered. Kickbacks, from a bridal registry.

Today the third invitation arrived, for one of Hubby's male cousins, also lived with the girl for 3-4 years, have a child, the house the whole deal. This invitation today was for her shower and at the bottom it says "the bride and groom have registered at Target, but sincerely appreciate all monetary gifts". This is the bridal shower invitation. And beyond that...wouldn't we all appreciate a monetary gift at this stage of the game?

Of course, knowing me, I'd probably spend my monetary gifts at Target on kitchen appliances anyway. :)

Refrigerator Shopping

2009-03-22T12:35:00.002-05:00

The refrigerator we currently have in our kitchen was basically on borrowed time when we got it. A few months after Nicholas was born and I quit my full-time, outside the home, good paying job, to be a full-time mom our refrigerator gave a shuddering sigh and died. This was only a month or so after father-in-law's house had burned to the ground and the insurance company had determined it to be a total loss and paid him for the entire contents...including the refrigerator.

The only damage to the fridge was cosmetic, and nothing some paint and some replaced plastic pieces couldn't fix and total cost us about $100. We figured we'd hang onto it for awhile and when finances allowed we'd replace it. Well, funny thing is as long as it's been working good we never even thought about shopping for a replacement!

Last week Hubby noticed the icemaker is barely producing any ice at all. Then this week one morning when I heard it kick on it was LOUD and sounded very, very odd. Which reminded me that for awhile now anytime something got pushed all the way to the back of the fridge it would freeze. Not a big deal for milk, juice, soda etc but kind of a pain in the ass for fresh produce. About a week ago I even had an entire pound of hamburger freeze solid in the refrigerator!

So, we started shopping around. A friend of ours manages the local Best Buy so we went in there to look around and let's just say I had a bit of sticker shock. Holy cow...$2000 for a refrigerator! And more!

Then yesterday we found out that a friend of a friends husband works at a locally owned appliance store that sometimes has scratch-n-dent type appliances for a really good deal. We ran out there to check it out and sure enough they have a Kitchenaid refrigerator for $800. No cosmetic damage at all but it came in with a bad part which their service department replaced and now they're selling it for less than half its original price--with no manuf. warranty.

At Lowe's this afternoon I came across their scratch-n-dent aisle and they have a Frigidaire, brand new, full warranty, marked down from $1250 to $825 with dent on one side. Only problem is it's on the exposed side and would totally show. Most people wouldn't comment, but my mother-in-law would comment on it every.single.time she came in my house. How much did you save because of that dent? Can you fix the dent? Maybe you could cover it up somehow so you can't see it? And on, and on, and on, and on.

I'm leaning more and more towards the Kitchenaid really.

The only caveat is that it's about 3" wider than our current refrigerator and since it's on their marked down list, it's no returns. If we get it home and it doesn't fit, we're stuck with a refrigerator. I've measured the opening a dozen times and it should just fit. Key word--should. :)

Back to work, and more wrinkles

2009-03-12T19:06:00.002-05:00

Hubby finally returned to work today and just to prove that apparently none of our days are meant to be drama free, we discovered his moron of a boss screwed up his vacation pay. And by screwed up I mean completely failed to turn it in and in fact listed Hubby as 'inactive' which made him not eliglble to collect vacation pay at all and therefore there was no paycheck waiting for him today--payday and wouldn't be one next week either! Apparently the boss decided it was best for him if we filed for short-term disability instead of collecting vacation pay. The man is a huge jackass who is utterly devoid of the people skills God gave an ape.

After hours of going around and round and eventually filing for back pay through short-term disability we JUST got a phone call saying the boss has stepped off his throne long enough to make a single phone call, reverse Hubby's 'inactive' status and submit two week's of vacation pay which should arrive no later than next Thursday (payday).

Tomorrow is the day!

2009-03-09T20:29:00.002-05:00

Tomorrow is the scheduled day for Hubby to have his stitches removed from his finger. I will admit to doing a mental countdown of sorts until the stitches come out, the doctor releases him and best of all he goes back to work! :) Not that I don't love him, but when you work from home, and then someone else is suddenly home with you all day, everyday, for a few weeks straight...well imagine if I came and sat in your office with you all day for the next couple of weeks while you tried to work and you get the picture I think.

And not only do I work from home, but I'm in the process of learning a new job. Just a little more stress for some more added fun, right?

Suffice it to say I like my schedule, and my routine and I'm more than anxious to get back to both so please, please, please, let them take the stitches out tomorrow!

In other, less entertaining news, we found out today that Hubby's brother-in-law lost his job today and since that means both Hubby's sister and her husband are both unemployed now you can safely say that's a scary situation for everyone.

What's next?

2009-03-03T08:44:00.002-06:00

Whenever we seem to be having a run of bad luck, or things seem to be going wrong Hubby will always say "what's next?" as if waiting for the other shoe to drop and it drives me crazy. I'm very much a glass half full type of person, I can find the positive in almost any situation but even I'm starting to wonder what's next? Over the weekend one of Hubby's grandmother's fell, and while she's uninjured it has really reinforced the fact that she's no longer able to live alone, so the family is looking into an assisted living facility for her. We found out yesterday his other grandmother has had what appears to be a series of mini-strokes, she's hospitalized and they aren't going to release her to go home only to go to a nursing home. Right now the family is weighing the options of whether that move is a short-term solution or a permanent arrangement.

The odd part of the whole story is when we went to visit the paternal grandmother yesterday in the hospital she SWEARS that Hubby was there with her when the strokes happened, that he'd been at her house all day long and they'd had the best visit. He hasn't been to her house in weeks and was nowhere near the town where she lives the day she had the strokes.

Murphy's Law for Moms

2009-02-28T08:28:00.002-06:00

For weeks now Hubby and I have been planning an evening out for tonight. Nothing fancy, just meeting some of his old classmates at a local tavern that serves the best fried fish you've ever eaten. My parents have agreed to keep the kids overnight, so we don't have to do the extra hour of running around at the end of the evening AND we can stay up as late as we want because we can sleep in guilt-free tomorrow morning.

So, of course, Murphy's Law has kicked in and the first words out of Nicholas's mouth this morning were "I feel weird" and everytime he sneezes he has snot running down his face. *sigh*

Logically I know he just has the same head cold his sister had earlier in the week, I ran out and got him some Tylenol Cold & Cough but you can't help but feel a bit guilty at the idea of leaving your child when they aren't feeling their best. So, at this point our plans are up in the air at best which really sucks because if memory serves the last time Hubby and I went out kid-free was close to 2 years ago.

Project 365

2009-02-25T20:00:00.002-06:00

Okay so I've completely fallen off the project 365 wagon in the last couple of weeks, between the insanity around the house, changing jobs, and general stress I have barely had time to brush my teeth let alone grab the camera. I'm really disappointed in myself for not doing a better job with it though and I don't intend to just let the project drop, hopefully beginning this weekend I can jump back on the bandwagon and get rolling again with only a few days of missed chances.

Is anyone else falling off the wagon with this or is it just me?

The latest news

2009-02-23T18:37:00.002-06:00

The good news is we saw the surgeon today, who was a very nice man, and got the report "no surgery needed". According to the surgeon the doctors in the ER last night did a fabulous job of stitching things back together and he wouldn't dream of torturing Hubby by reopening the wound today. Whew.

Hubby will be home with me all week this week, then go back to work with restrictive duty on Monday and back to the Dr in two weeks to have the stitches removed.

Even better news according to Hubby is the instructions that he NOT keep it immobile, that he go ahead and get it wet--even soak it in warm soapy water twice a day--so he can shower, etc.

The only negative so far is the nausea persists and since he's taken Vicodin for pain before after his sinus surgery we know it's not from that. Could be just the stomach bug we've all had in the last week, or could be just an upset stomach from the stress, etc of the last few days either way I'm pretty sure he'll live provided he lays still and lets me get some sleep tonight. :)

God won't give us more than we can handle

2009-02-22T19:34:00.002-06:00

You know that old expression about how God won't give you more than you can handle? I'm starting to wonder if maybe He is overestimating my ability to handle things lately. The latest happened today when Hubby ran in the back door SCREAMING my name and dripping blood--yes blood--all through the house. He'd been using one of his power saws outside to cut a piece of wood, following all the appropriate safety precautions, but the piece of wood caught on the blade, pulled his hand forward and smashed his finger between the block of wood and the metal "guard" which is supposed to keep your fingers out of the blade. It smashed his finger hard enough it nearly smashed the end of his finger OFF.

Several hours in the emergency room later we find he has broken his finger, as well as partially amputating the tip. The emergency room called the plastic/hand surgeon who declined to come in and see us, and instead instructed them to clean the wuond and stitch it closed temporarily and have us come to his office first thing in the morning.

So now Hubby is missing yet another day of work, and on my second week of a new job I have to make an excuse to be away from the computer for a few hours so I can drive him to the surgeon's office so they can remove the stitches the ER put in, check to make sure the tendons and ligaments aren't damaged and evaluate whether or not he needs surgery or just more cosmetic stitches put in his finger.

His finger is a mess, to be honest with you, it's one of the more disgusting sights I've ever seen. His finger nail is loose. Apparently the doctors main concerns are infection, and that since it's not cut, but rather smashed and twisted it's not a clean wound but rather more like ripped fabric.

I just pray that we're getting all our crappy stuff out of the way in February so the rest of the year goes fabulously. If the muscles in my neck/shoulders get any more tense I think I might just pop.

The beautiful moment of watching your child slip into sleep

2009-02-20T16:03:00.002-06:00

As a parent, and especially a mom, there's nothing more touching and sentimental than watching your infant slip into sleep in your arms. Feeling that transition from awake, to sleep as they completely relax and trust you to keep them safe while they rest is beautiful and humbling. As they grow the opportunities to watch them slip into sleep become more rare, and more precious, and also sometimes less...well, cute!

Today after school Nicholas fell asleep, sitting up, on the couch while watching TV. Something that's not at all unusual for him! I happened to be standing in front of him, folding a blanket they'd been playing with, as he dozed off and got to just stand there and watch as first one eye slipped closed, then the second, and his head bobbed a little bit to the side and he gave into the need to rest. He might not be a newborn sleeping in my arms anymore, but he's still my baby and he's pretty cute when he nods off to sleep. Of course, now he snores...

Dealing with Stress

2009-02-19T20:11:00.002-06:00

I'm thinking a lot about how we each deal with stress in our lives. Stress is, after all, inevitable and unavoidable. We all have it in our daily lives to one extent or another so in the end it's more about how we handle and manage it than about having it or not having it.

My mother-in-law tends to work herself up until she makes herself genuinely ill. She'll end up in the emergency room because stress will either bring on chest pains, a diabetic attack, or a panic attack of some sort.

My husband tends to either get upset, raise his voice, etc or say nothing until weeks or months later and then kablooey! :)

My sister and myself tend to talk about things to each other, but sometimes not the person we should talk to, and otherwise internalize things and sometimes just put my head in the sand and avoid dealing with things. Which, in the end, is definitely not the best way to handle pretty much anything.

The short version is that hubby and I have realized we both need to make some changes to how we handle some things and are working towards that--but change is never easy especially when one is changing oneself.

Why won't my baby sleep?

2009-02-18T19:11:00.003-06:00

As many of you know I started a brand new job this week for ParentsConnect.com, a Nickelodeon website. I'm really excited to be joining the team and can't wait to really get started. Those of you who found this post through a Google search are probably wondering what my new job has to do with your child's insomnia, so I'll get right to the point!

Stop by the site and join the BootCamp where you can learn first hand, expert advice on how to encourage your child, or baby, to sleep! Read Dr. Weissbluth's advice, take the challenge and give it a try and then best of all--you can post your questions and get first hand advice from Dr. Weissbluth. Then stay tuned for more challenges in the coming days and weeks and before you know it you and your children will be sleeping through the night.

Does it drive you crazy when...

2009-02-16T13:40:00.001-06:00

The backcover blurb on a book is completely misleading? I ran to Borders last week and picked up two books by authors who I consider to be a "sure bet" when it comes to buying books. Both books were part of series I've been reading, so while I glanced at them I didn't study them and weigh getting them like I would have with a new author (or new to me) or a series I hadn't already started reading.

The first one I read (Marliss Melton, Too Far Gone) definitely lived up to the others in the series. I started the second one today, and I have LOVED the rest of the series, but this one I doubt I'll even finish. It's Lori Foster's, My Man, Michael--the rest of the series is focusing on UFC (ultimate fighting) heroes and the women who love them. :) This one, however, starts with our hero recovering from a horrific car accident and being swept away by a time traveler heroine from the year 2223 who heals his wounds with a kiss, declares herself a virgin, and a warrior who needs him to save her "colony".

Don't get me wrong, I know paranormals have a huge market out there, but I'm not a member of it and I wouldn't have picked this book up if the back cover had even implied that's what I'd be getting for my $8.

Now, I love Lori Foster's work and this will in no way prevent me from buying (and loving) future titles she releases but I can't help feeling a bit deceived by this one. What do you think?

The most exhausting week ever

2009-02-14T06:05:00.003-06:00

Looking back I think this past week may well be one of the most exhausting, stressful, decision filled weeks of my life. It started off with some really fantastic news, a new job I've really wanted is mine which was VERY exciting! Then came the reality of resigning my current job, of five years, and breaking the news to my friends there and seeing the shocked responses from my supervisors. That was hard, definitely hard but I can do the math, and I know the new job is right for me and for my family.

The rest of the stressful events I'm going to glaze over a bit, partly because I've found out in the past few days there are people who regularly read this blog that I had no idea about! The best analogy I can think of to describe what's happened here since Wednesday is that Hubby and I have both gone through a long, dark tunnel and come out the other side determined to be better, to do better, and to go forward but there were definitely long moments inside that tunnel when neither of us were sure that was going to happen.

Last night is the first night I've really slept all week long, and last night at dinner was the first time I've eaten anything since Wednesday for lunch. I still have a bit of a nervous knot in my stomach but it's starting to go away a little bit. This weekend will be all about reassuring the kids that we're fine, and they're fine, and that no matter what we love one another.

After all, it is Valentine's Day!

American Kids?

2009-02-08T14:40:00.002-06:00

Maddy picked up a flyer about auditions to join a group called American Kids from her dance studio last week and honestly it's been such a busy week we've barely had time to talk about it let alone do much research. Basically it sounds like a YMCA type organization but for entertaining instead of sports oriented kids. I'll admit it's a neat/interesting concept. I have this one odd hang up though. Look at the homepage and tell me...does the photo of that guy, the founder, not strike you as insanely creepy? LOL

The local chapter, if that's the proper term, is actually run by one of the mom's at the dance studio so tomorrow I plan to find out a little more information and see if this is really something Maddy would be interested in or not. And, of course, if the creepy looking dude would be around or not when she's there. ;)

Unemployment Is More than Just Numbers

2009-02-06T13:42:00.002-06:00

Last night we got word that Hubby's sister was laid off yesterday, making her the sixth person in our circle of friends and family to lose her job in the last few months. While hubby and I both think we're okay, the truth is in this economy none of us really know, do we?

Sex Education

2009-02-04T18:25:00.003-06:00

Pardon me if I seem a little bit...flustered. That's because, well frankly I'm as flustered as you can get! :) Today in my daughter's--my 10 yr old daughter--backpack I received a note that informed Hubby and I that state law mandates that all 4th, 5th, and 6th grade classes participate in a sex education class, and more specifically an AIDS awareness class and that our daughter's class will be completing this required course "soon".

Now I'm not so naive as to think that 10 yr olds don't have some basic knowledge of sex education that they've picked up from various sources, television, music, the Internet, and dumb things their dad says that he thinks they won't pick up on. Nor am I so naive as to think that there aren't some 10 yr olds out there in this big bad world that are already engaging in some form of sexual activity. (shudder) I also know that there are some 10 yr old girls who are already starting to have their periods and so of course they need an explanation of the basics.

I am, however, naive enough to think that at 10 yrs old her sum total of sexual knowledge should come from her parents. I'm also mature and eyes-wide-open enough to know that once she and her friends have this knowledge, their innocence is over.

At this point, there are no girls in her class who are giggling and flirting with boys. There are no boys and girls who are "boyfriend and girlfriend". Do we honestly think that will continue once they're shown anatomically correct drawings and a full on lesson on where babies come from?

On one hand, I don't want to single her out and sign the form saying I do not give permission for her to attend. On the other hand, I'd really like to protect the little bubble she lives in for a few more days, weeks, months...years!

You know what they say about opinions

2009-02-03T15:45:00.002-06:00

Everyone has one, and everyone's dying to share it with you. I've been spending a lot of time doing research on the issue of holding Nicholas back in Kindergarten next year or pushing him on to first grade. I've asked other teachers, some who have had experience with him and some that my daughter had. I've asked friends who have boys, and friends who have education experiences either by working in education or being involved in the school on a level I haven't. So far it's unanimously in favor of it. Today I had an extensive conversation with Maddy's first grade teacher who said, and I quote "there really is no negative". She herself was held back in 2nd grade, and went from struggling to being an honor student and now of course is a teacher. Other parents who have boys with late birthdays have said they regret not doing it. The only real naysayers are my mother and my sister of all people who are categorically opposed to it and won't even consider it.

My sister was advised to hold her eldest back in prek, kindergarten and first grade. He's since been diagnosed with auditory processing disorder, reading issues, ADD and something else that escapes me. I can't help but wonder if she'd held him back would the diagnosis still have been made? Does he really have all those issues or does he have those issues when compared to other kids in his grade level? Is she just opposed to retaining Nicholas because it would be potentially proving her wrong?

Anyway, the decision is ultimately only mine and Hubby's, we can ask opinions but that doesn't mean we have to follow it right?

Project 365 Week's four & five

2009-02-01T22:39:00.003-06:00

It's late, I'll come back later and edit in the credits for the papers and elements.

There's no guarantee

2009-01-30T19:37:00.003-06:00

Well today was the day I've been dreading for the last nine weeks, parent/teacher conferences. While the conference with Nicholas's teacher was much more upbeat than the last one she is still in favor of "retaining" him and having him repeat kindergarten. While she's no longer mentioning learning disability or that his skills aren't progressing as she'd like, she does think that even best-case-scenario there's no way he can catch up to those at the top of his class. She also feels that because of when his birthday falls, he's young for his class and therefore immature. I don't disagree, I'd even hazard to say that compared to another kid his exact same age he might be on the more immature side of the curve. Between being very shy, and being at home with a stay-at-home mom he hasn't necessarily had some of the life-experiences he might have if he'd gone to day care. Of course, there are pros and cons to that.

She feels that by retaining him and giving him that extra year of maturity it can give him the potential to go from a lifetime of struggling in school and always having things like reading be a difficult challenge for him to being at the top of his class. Of course that sounds fabulous, where do I sign up for that guarantee? There simply isn't one. There's no guarantee that if I retain him in kindergarten school will be easier for him than if I don't retain him. There's no guarantee that he'll become more confident and less shy, there's always the possibility of retaining him causing him to be more insecure and therefore more shy.

I simply don't know how I'm supposed to make this decision. I think either way I go I'm going to question for the rest of his life if I made the right call. Do I disregard the advice of a woman with thirty years experience, or do I disregard my instincts as his mother?

She did say that he's very good at math, clearly he likes the black and white aspects involved in doing addition and subtraction. Where as with reading there is more grey area. Sometimes 'a' makes this sound, sometimes it makes that. If there's an 'e' at the end the other vowels do this, if not they do that. But he's easily distracted and doesn't stay 'on task' well and she feels that this will be his downfall in first grade when he'll be expected to work more independently rather than in a group.

For now my plan is to email the teacher Maddy had for first grade, she's a true sweetheart and since Maddy was in her first class out of college and I was the very involved room parent we formed a bit of a friendship. I plan to email her on Monday and ask for her take on things, as a first grade teacher. I don't have to make a decision until May, and it's only January. Things are already better now than they were a few months ago so I think I'll just continue to pray for a miracle and see how it goes. :)

Sledding Videos

2009-01-28T10:51:00.018-06:00

I know they're very amateur, but they're also hilarious to me!

Can I just say that videos take for-freaking-ever to upload in Blogger. Seriously this is crazy!

Snow days!

2009-01-28T07:41:00.002-06:00

Do you remember when you were little, listening to the radio announcer read the list of schools that were closed and silently praying he'd say the name of YOUR school? My sister and I would sit in the hall outside my parents bedroom, listening to my dad's clock radio set to the local AM radio station as the announcer read the list of schools off in a very dry, very monotone voice. As soon as he got to the "O's" we'd get very quiet and listen, we knew which school would come before ours, and we knew what school would come after--if he skipped ours we were crushed! Convinced all the other schools got out way easier than we did, clearly we were being punished or something!

But oh the magic on those days he did say our school's name! We'd hurry through breakfast as quick as mom could get something together and then it was off to dig through our closets, and sometimes hers, to find clothes we could layer on top of each other to keep warm and dry for as long as possible. There were no fancy snow suits for us, I don't know why, probably because we were growing like weeds still and if they bought one this year, it wouldn't fit by next. Boots, hats, gloves, two pairs of jeans and a swiped pair of dad's long johns and we were out the door.

Snow on our road was a fabulous time to live at my house. We lived out in the country on a rural road where everyone knew everyone else and if you were out of town, someone would just gather your mail for you, keep an eye on things, and even sneak the dog a few milk bones while you were gone. We also happened to live at the top of the biggest hill around which meant we lived at the top of the best sledding hill...ever!

Every kid in the neighborhood would end up in our front yard, my mom would make sure she thought everyone was as bundled as they ought to be and then we'd take off out the back door to the top of the hill, knowing that while we were out there my mom was making a batch of her famous, homemade, from scratch hot cocoa--with mini marshmallows of course!

One year for Christmas my dad and my uncle had made my sister and I homemade sleds. I know, who does that right? My dad and uncle that's who. And as luck would have it, probably by design, they were the f.a.s.t.e.s.t sleds in the neighborhood! Everyone wanted to ride on our sleds which translated to my sister and I never ever having to carry them back to the top of that huge hill! :) Yay!

These days there are two big houses, with driveways and landscaping and all the rest on that hill behind my parents house so there's no more sledding back there. My kids prefer to sled behind the ATV while hubby is driving. No work, no hill climbing, and best of all you get to go FAST!

The kids were off school yesterday, and today and luckily so is hubby so there will be much sledding done again today. I've captured a few pictures from the back porch but since it was also sleeting all day yesterday (which apparently didn't bother them) I opted not to go out and play and instead be inside on hot cocoa duty. It's a family tradition after all!

And to round out the week

2009-01-23T19:06:00.002-06:00

Just to recap, this week we've had Hubby home with a strained lower back, Nicholas has strep throat and now just to round out the week I got a phone call from Maddy this morning, in the nurses office, crying. I've been wondering for a few days now if the sinus infection she had at Christmas was back, and that pretty much told me it was for sure. Luckily I was able to get the pediatrician's office to call in a refill of her antibiotics so I didn't have to go back to the office again. Two trips to the pediatrician's office in one week is nobody's idea of a good week. So instead I just had to run to the pharmacy--4th trip there since Monday by the way! lol For typically healthy people we've had a lot of prescriptions this week!

Hubby's back is starting to feel better, mostly because he finally started to listen to me and yesterday sat in the hot tub twice for about an hour each time and did his physicla therapy stretches before and after. Today he was almost pain free! Fingers crossed that means next week we get to go back to our normal schedule. You know what a freak I am for my schedule!

One of the hard things about being a mom

2009-01-22T21:38:00.003-06:00

One of the hard things, at least for me, in being a mom is encouraging my kids to take risks that I might not personally be able to take. I'm not talking about skydiving or bungee jumping--I'd totally do those by the way--I'm talking about things that make me break out in a cold sweat. Things like--my daughter performing in dance recitals and other things that require her to be on stage, in the spotlight, in front of a few hundred people. Total cold sweats for me. Not even cold sweats, those really ugly flop sweats you used to get on first dates in high school--where you hoped he didn't try to hold your hand because you were pretty sure your hands were so sweaty you couldn't grip his hand back. Not that this ever happened to me personally, of course. :)

But performing is something she enjoys, and seems to be good at, so I have to swallow my fear so she doesn't feel it and encourage her to try it. Turned out she loved it, never had a moment's nervousness or uncertainty and thrived in the spotlight.

Another area where the little girl who is so much like me, is completely different from her mother is that she is willing to try any food you put in front of her at least once. I love to cook, and I love to eat, but there are things I just cannot even make myself try. I'm not adventurous when it comes to culinary things. My daughter loves fruits and vegetables, and she'll beg for broccoli in the supermarket like most kids beg for bubblegum. To her candy is sour, and fruit is amazingly sweet.

Last night we took the kids to a new Chinese restaurant in town that just opened up. When we got there it was completely different than the buffet we usually go to. This one was let's just say...fancier. :) Maddy piled her plate with every variety of food and tried at least one bite of everything. At one point I was teasing Hubby and asking him if he was going to try sushi while we were there. He immediately replied that he definitely was not trying sushi and did I know what that was? Maddy chimes in and says she might try it because it looks really yummy. So after trying a variety of seafood including crab legs that she'd never had before she did indeed load her plate with four different varieties of sushi and discovered that she liked 3 out of the 4 varieties.

The older couple at the table next to us, who were having their own little sushi buffet at their table, found the whole thing charming and adorable. I wish I'd brought my camera because THAT would surely have been my photo-a-day picture for yesterday if I had!

It's good to have a plan...

2009-01-19T20:46:00.002-06:00

Oh I had such a plan for today. Mondays are the day that Hubby is out of town for work, today being MLK day the kids were out of school and I was off work. I thought we'd have a nice relaxing day, play a few games, I'd get some housework done, Maddy has dance on Monday nights and tehn I thought we'd have a super-kid-friendly dinner. It's good to have a plan don't you think?? I was so looking forward to today.

The reality went more like this, yesterday Nicholas woke up announcing he had a sore throat and when I touched him I knew he had a fever. Since several of his classmates had already come down with strep throat I knew immediately he had it, too. So that meant this morning I was immediately calling the pediatrician's office when they opened and hoping I could get us an early appointment. We love our pediatrician, but they are a 45 minute drive from our house so that means all total an hour and a half in the car, plus whatever time you're actually at the office. It easily feels like it takes half your day just to go there, especially if it's not planned. Luckily I got us a 9:40 appointment which was perfect, he does indeed have strep throat so we were able to get him his antibiotics early enough in the day that he got two doses in today and he's good to go back to school tomorrow without worrying about being contagious.

So that was the first half of the day.

The second half of the day involved Hubby coming home from work with a sore back. His back has actually been bothering him for most of the last two weeks but apparently this morning he did something as soon as he got to work and that was just the last straw. A trip to the urgent care center revealed a sprained lower lumbar. Muscle relaxers, physical therapy and rest were the order of the day. Which means he came home, took a muscle relaxer and went to bed. Kind of hard to get any housework done with a sleeping man in the house and a whining boy on the couch.

Oh and that super-kid-friendly dinner--yeah not going to happen with the Hubs home so I threw something in the crockpot, ran Maddy to dance, came home and ate dinner and counted down to time for them all to go to bed!!

My nice relaxing day was anything but relaxing. The good news is Hubby's back is feeling better, he goes back to physical therapy tomorrow, after 2 doses of antibiotics Nicholas was literally bouncing off the walls so I think he feels better, too. :)

Hopefully Hubby will work a full day tomorrow, or at least a good portion of it and everyone will have a full day of school. I promise if it snows tonight I'm going to lose my mind!

Week Three-January 10-17

2009-01-18T19:06:00.003-06:00

This week was harder to get interesting pictures, our temperatures here were in the single digits for a good part of the week which means most of the family didn't venture far from the house to do anything interesting. I did get some cute pics though! The one of Hubby and Nicholas comparing hands is one of my favorites. Otherwise it's pretty much just a snapshot of the ordinary week in our house, getting ready for dance, for school, having a snack, and ordinary 'kid stuff'. :) I'm still really enjoying the project so far.

Pages and elements from Melanie Ann's Designs Chocoberry downloaded from Digital Freebies

A brag book for boys

2009-01-17T15:50:00.007-06:00

As I mentioned in my last post Nicholas's BFF is moving away sometime in the next two weeks. Because they're only five years old, realistically the chances that they will be able to stay in touch and maintain a friendship are nill. I mean it's not like they are my friends and they can read each other's blogs and catch up on Facebook. And even more depressing is that chances of them remembering one another 5-10-15 years from now aren't great either. So, being the mom and the sentimental fool that I am I've decided to make them each a mini-scrapbook to remember one another by. I only have a few pictures of them together, but in Ian's book I'm going to include some additional photos of things like his house, the school, his classroom, their kindergarten teacher, and one just of Nicholas smiling so I'm not at all worried about filling his up. Nicholas' will only have a few photos but that'll be okay.

Here's what I've done so far, some of them I made at the time the photos were taken so I'm going to be honest and just say--I don't have all the details on what papers, etc I used on all of them.

Unbelievably cold...and catching up

2009-01-15T20:03:00.002-06:00

This week the midwest is caught in the same vicious cold snap as much of the rest of the country. As I type this, it's 7* outside--that's actual temperature, not wind chill. I don't even want to talk about the wind chill. I know, other parts of the country are colder. I don't want to talk--or think--about that either! I want a warm sunny day and I want it NOW!

In other news, Nicholas's best-friend lives across the street from our house. Nicholas, as you know, is a very shy child who doesn't make friends easily but from the very first time they got together Nicholas and Ian have been fast-friends. They can play for hours and hours without a single interruption and I truly don't think they've ever had an argument. Ian's mom and I can let the boys play together for an entire afternoon and yet when it's time to go home one of them is going to cry and raise a fuss. I was so excited when we found out that Ian and Nicholas were in the same Kindergarten class this year! Ian is very outgoing and chatty, where as Nicholas is shy and reserved. Together they kind of balance each other out. Nicholas is braver when he's in Ian's company--in a good way.

Several months ago we found out that Ian's dad was going to be getting out of the Air Force and the family would be moving back "home" when that happened. Being that it's the military the paperwork process took three times as long as predicted but Ian's mom told me today at school the day is drawing alarmingly close. Tuesday Ian's dad is officially discharged from the military and they'll be moving just as quickly as they can get packed up and hire movers.

I know that a friend moving away is always bittersweet at any age, and for everyone, but for Nicholas who doesn't bond or make friends easily this one is really hard. At least on me. Nicholas isn't saying much one way or the other except that when Ian moves he'll never see him, ever again--and not even that is with tears or much reaction. I think that it's too big of a concept for him to get still.

I need to work on getting to know more of the other parents of boys in his class so that I can help him foster a new friendship. I know he plays with other boys from class, but I don't really know them and I don't know their parents at all--and I mean not even enough to identify which parent goes to which kid. Clearly I suck.

I'm working on making a little scrapbook of photos I have of the two boys over the years for Nicholas to give Ian before they move. My fear though is that literally we'll wake up one morning to watch moving trucks move away from the house and they'll just be gone.

The Uniform of a Mom

2009-01-12T19:31:00.003-06:00

A long time ago, in a land far away...okay so it was right here and not all that long ago really, but the point is there was a time when I was fairly stylish. I knew where to shop and I knew what to wear and I could shop with the best of 'em. I could find bargains and hot little numbers. I had more clothes than would fit in my closet, and I wore all of them. I loved clothes, and frankly I think they had the warm fuzzy feelings for me, too.

I was tall, and I was thin, and I was confident. And then a series of events happened that changed two of the three (hint, I'm still tall).

After I became a mom the wardrobe, or for the purposes of this blog the uniform, changed a bit. I no longer fit into the same size I did before I got pregnant but I was sure that was temporary so I bought comfy, casual, not fabulous clothes to get me through until my thin and fabulous body came back. I'm still waiting. :) Another contributing factor was the budget I had available to buy clothes for myself, clearly a luxury item, had been cut at least in half as I now had a little person who was cute, and fabulous to dress up and show off. There was a hidden motive to part of that--if the baby was cute and fabulous it distracted people from looking at her simply unfabulous mother and whispering things like "she never did lose that baby weight did she, sigh".

Then the final blow to the uniform came in the form of a second child and a fabulous opportunity to be able to stay at home with my children and work from home. No longer in need of a uniform to wear to an office job, or really even out of the house on most days the clothes slowly became more comfortable, more casual and dare I say it--more sloppy--with each passing week.

For most of the last year I have existed exclusively in sweats of one kind or another. I tried to disguise them by buying "nice sweats" so I could wear them out of the house but deep down I still knew they were sweats. Elastic waistbands are difficult to hide, after all.

There was a time when I at least wore jeans and t-shirts, but as the jeans wore out or needed replaced instead of trying on jeans, I just bought another pair of sweats. They were perfect really, comfortable, easy to lounge around in and frankly if they protected my modesty they became good enough to run errands. The only time it really bothered me was when we had somewhere social to go, then I felt like the poor relative while my children and even my husband wore their nicer clothes. But I didn't do anything about it because you see by this time I didn't want to buy jeans because that pesky size label wasn't going to display the same number as it did last time I bought jeans, and to be clear I hadn't liked that number...I flat out hated the one that fit now!

While it was a slow progression from office clothes, to full time sweats, it wasn't at all subconscious. I was completely aware of what I was doing, but it didn't really bother me until a few days ago when I had to go to the store to buy myself some clothes because frankly every single pair I owned had a hole in them somewhere. Seriously. So the kids and I go to Target and I'm looking at sweats, and my cute, precious, adorable 10 yr old daughter asks me softly "Mom, why don't you get some jeans?".

So I resolved to buy at least a pair or two of jeans, even if I had to try on a dozen pair to find some that fit, and even if the size label was horrifying to read. Surprisingly I only had to try on two pair to find the ones I liked, and the size label wasn't all that horrifying--only one size bigger than the last time I bought jeans and they're actually a bit baggy...I could've tried on the smaller size but I decided to go with the good feelings and avoid depression at all costs.

So, while my mom uniform is still fairly casual at least I don't feel quite like the poor relative when we go out. While it wouldn't have excited the old fashionista me, it's nice to be able to put clothes on to run to school, or the grocery store, and not wonder if people think I'm heading to the gym after I'm done with my errands.

Week Two-January 4-10

2009-01-11T20:41:00.003-06:00

I am so excited about the pictures I got this week many of which I'd never have taken if not for this project. I carried my camera to my parents house on just a random Monday evening and got a great picture of my dad and Nicholas playing a game, and another one of Nicholas and his best (and first) friend playing on the playground.

I used the same template as I did last week (I'll probably use it each week so that'll be a running theme. The pages and elements are from a kit called Spontaneous Delight that was created by Carrie Stephens. I have absolutely no idea where I downloaded it from though--sorry!

Finally...some good news for Dad

2009-01-07T15:26:00.002-06:00

I'm so happy to finally come back and report some good news for my dad for a change. He was released by the cardiologist to go back to work this week, so he started back on Monday. Can anyone even imagine how tiring that was after 6 months of sitting at home recovering from heart surgery? Now granted he was released because he told the doctor "either release me, or I need to learn how to live in the car"...but still. :) The visit with the pulmonologist revealed that the nodules in his lungs are too small to identify so the plan is to do a scan every 3 months for a year and watch them. The mass they saw on the CT scan of his spine was "nothing to worry about" according to the neurologist.

The only down side is that way back in July before the first heart attack and subsequent surgery my dad was working to accumulate enough leave time from work to have knee reconstruction surgery and of course now he's beyond out of time and has to go back to work without that knee surgery. Yesterday, day two back to work, his knee hurt really bad. I invited him to come soak in the hot tub tonight if he wants or anytime to see if that helps--and come on, it couldn't hurt right?

My mom was so cute the first day he was back at work, making his favorite meal for dinner and the whole deal. Hopefully this is the first sign that 2009 will be BETTER than 2008.

Thanks so much for all your thoughts and prayers over the last 6 months, I can't tell you how much they mean to me.

Week One-January 1-3, 2009

2009-01-05T21:06:00.004-06:00

Week one's layout page includes a photo of my son asleep on the couch New Year's Day--he's infamous for this. One minute he's bouncing off the walls driving you nutty, the next he's curled up under his "blankey" with his thumb in his mouth and his trusty "Blueberry" bear next to him. The second photo is a loaf of fresh baked sourdough bread--a staple in our house in the winter months. The third is a picture of my daughter enjoy a slice of the bread, dressed in her favorite dancing/relaxing outfit and looking beautiful as always. :)

I've downloaded the Photo-a-Day album templates from Pickleberry Pop to do my Project 365 with, and the papers and elements are from Peppermint Creative's After Midnight kit from last New Year's!

Photo A Day Project

2009-01-04T21:52:00.002-06:00

Just a quick update that I've managed to keep up with the photo-a-day project so far I just haven't managed to actually download any of them out of the camera and do anything with them. :) Hopefully tomorrow night I can get some posted to share. I think rather than trying to keep up with a whole other blog for the project I'm just going to post them here once a week with the keyword "project 365" so if you'd like to keep up with the photos I take you can just click the tag and see all the posts. :)

Project 365

2009-01-01T18:26:00.003-06:00

A friend mentioned recently in her blog that she's taking on Project 365 and I told her I'd think about doing it with her. I actually forgot all about it until today, so I grabbed the camera and took a couple of photos so I guess that means I'm going to give it a shot. I'm a little worried that some days will be so hectic I won't even think of grabbing the camera, but like I told Hubby earlier--I have nothing to lose and it doesn't cost me anything to try so here goes nothing!

What a year

2008-12-30T21:55:00.003-06:00

I've never been one to make a big deal out of New Year's Eve, I mean really it's just Wednesday and the next day is Thursday it just happens to be the day we change our calendars out for a newer one. But it is a good time to stop and take stock and reflect on what the last 12 months have brought your way. This past year has definitely brought us unexpected bumps in the road that have sent us careening down a path we didn't anticipate. But as they say, that which does not kill us, makes us stronger. If that's true I'm infinitely stronger today than I was a year ago. :)

Here's hoping that 2009 brings you rich rewards and deep satisfaction along with unexpected joys and happiness.

More complications for Dad

2008-12-29T11:33:00.002-06:00

Christmas Eve my dad had to go back to his regular doctor to have a spot on his incision from the bypass surgery checked out. It had developed a small cyst type bump about 3/4's of the way down the incision that was leaking puss. (Sorry, TMI I know)

The physician's assistant was the only one available to see him on Christmas Eve and she told him that it was a sign of infection on the inside of the incision and that those sometimes occur where the surgeon tied the knot in the stitches. Only problem is she knows for sure that the knot wouldn't have been located at the spot where the cyst developed so the cause is a mystery for now. He's on antibiotics and they put something on the spot to help draw the infection out, which causes more pain/discomfort and more oozing. So, he's back on the Darvocet for pain. He has an appointment today with the Cardiologist who was supposed to be releasing him to go back to work finally but of course that won't happen now. January 4th is the 6 month anniversary of the first heart attack, surgery was 5 days later on the 9th and he's still not back to work, still not getting paid, still in pain and discomfort everyday.

Needless to say, I'm a bit aggravated at the whole thing if you can't tell by my post. P&PTs appreciated.

Batteries Included

2008-12-29T11:27:00.002-06:00

Nicholas got a V. Smile Pocket for Christmas from Santa. Unfortunately the one Santa delivered didn't work so we had to exchange it. Good luck explaining why a toy from Santa, that the Elves supposedly made has to be exchanged at Wal-Mart and why Mom has the receipt for it in her wallet. :)

When we exchanged the toy they didn't have the regular Pocket version anymore but they had the CyberPocket, which is essentially the same toy but the screen flips open, and it had a small flashdrive type gizmo you can plug into the PC to track scores, etc. The original toy had said "batteries included" so I needed to check the new box to make sure it had batteries, too or else I'd need to pick some up.

And now we arrive at the point of this post (I know you're thinking FINALLY). The new toy, the V. Smile CyberPocket said "Requires 4-"AA" batteries, included" and then in smaller print, in parenthesis it said "batteries included are for display purposes only".

WHAT? So, now I'll always wonder if the cause of death on the first toy was that we used the batteries that came in the package. Just to be safe I put a fresh batch of Energizer's in the new one and so far, so good.

The Rockettes Baby

2008-12-23T07:49:00.002-06:00

I'm not really sure what I expected from the Radio City Christmas Spectacular show--apparently I expected it to be spectacular and Christmassy but that's about all I had going in. It was that and more. I guess you can't go around using "spectacular" in the name of your show and then not living up to it right?

I'm sure you're like me and you've seen The Rockettes on television--Macy's Thanksgiving Parade, etc. So you think you know what to expect right? Gorgeous legs, kicking and dancing in unison. *yawn*

There's a reason why years ago little girls grew up saying they wanted to be a Rockette. Not only am I absolutely certain that I'd need a course of oxygen after one dance number, and they did 2 hours worth of them, but I'm also certain that I'd be the one to lose my balance in the high kick line and instead of a stunning display of talent, strength, grace and beauty...we'd have a big old pile of half naked girls screeching "GET OFF ME!".

Get to the point, you say? Okay.

The show was lighthearted fun, pure and simple. It's an absolutely perfect way to forget your troubles during the busy, hectic holiday season and remember how to smile. Taking Maddy was a special treasure, the whole seeing it through the eyes of a child plus whenever they would do something really amazing in the dance she'd quietly say "whoa" under her breath and I'd be grinning all over again!

The one part that definitely caught me by surprise though is how Christian based the whole thing is. Santa is the narrator and in almost every single number but it's the end that puts it over the top really. The Living Nativity is one of the two elements of the show that has remained unchanged and appeared in every single show since 1933. Live animals and a full cast to reenact the Nativity including the journey to Bethlehem. (This is the point where Maddy says, "whoa, that's a real sheep!" and we all got the giggles!) Just before the Nativity starts, they read a poem and show it on a large screen, the title was One Solitary Life.

So it was more than just some long legs dancing to Christmas Carols, although there was definitely a lot of that, too! And you definitely, definitely come out of the theater singing Carols and filled with the Christmas spirit.

Believing in Magic

2008-12-21T20:07:00.002-06:00

For the last several months I've wondered if Maddy still believes in Santa or not. I mean she's 10 years old, and I know for a fact that her BFF has known the truth about Santa for the last couple of years so I just figured at some point it had come up. I mean isn't that how we all found out? A friend figures it out and shares the newfound knowledge with the world. For me it was first grade, I can't remember which girl told us but I remember vividly sitting at a table making paper mache' craft projects when someone told the group of us, emphatically, there was no Santa.

I also remember hurrying home to quiz my mother and get to the bottom of the whole sordid thing. I remember my Mom telling me that in fact she and my Dad were Santa and that part of knowing the truth was that I now got to be in on the fun. That Christmas at my Grandparents house, my cousins and I were sleeping--or pretending to--in the upstairs bedroom when my younger cousin decided he HAD to have a drink of water. Now, since I was now in on the secret I knew if he went downstairs he'd blow the surprise for everyone. So I did my best to convince him NOT to go downstairs but he wouldn't hear of it. Finally I went downstairs to tell all the adults that he needed a drink and was about to catch them--when I got there they weren't doing anything! They were sitting around the table laughing, playing a card game and eating cookies. There was no secret to expose because they weren't doing anything. It was all very anticlimactic for me. :)

Ever since then one of my favorite parts of Christmas has been being "in on" the whole magic of being Santa for the kids in my life. First my sister, then later my younger cousins, and eventually my own kids. Being Santa every year is truly one of my favorite parts of being a Mom. Paying attention as the kids make little wishes for something small, and then ensuring that it's under the tree on Christmas morning is truly the Magic of the holidays, at least to me.

So it was with a mixture of anticipation and regret that I awaited the day when Maddy figured out that rather than some magical sleigh, pulled by reindeer it was really me who delivered her favorite surprises every year. I figured she knew and was just enjoying one last year of the magic before she confessed. I've even been a little lax and let her see some of Nicholas's gifts and just told her that she is on the secrets now because she's a big girl now. I've given her literally dozens of opportunities to tell me she knows the truth, and was starting to get my feelings a little hurt that she wasn't confiding in me. Then tonight we watched The Polar Express, and while she questioned some of the movie's more outlandish magical moments--a train that travels through yards without tracks for example--at one point she said almost to herself, "I haven't even written my letter to Santa yet this year". It was then that I knew, I get at least one more year of being Santa for both my kids, one more year where they both completely believe in the Magic, and one more year of doing my absolute favorite thing. And since she's 10 yrs old, I know that it really is probably the very last year of her believing so completely in the Magic so I will get to cherish every bit of it.

Does this count as a hybrid project?

2008-12-18T19:19:00.002-06:00

So if I'm being perfectly honest with you, I really hate buying teacher's gifts for holidays. I know it's supposed to be this big gesture of gratitude and most of the time I am really, really grateful when my kids have fabulous teachers. But you know what, I think I show that gratitude throughout the year by doing things like helping out with class parties, sending in supplies whenever they ask and oh I don't know saying THANK YOU whenever I talk to them!

I also think that my hatred of buying them gifts started when Maddy was in preschool at a private preschool and all of the other parents were frankly a little bit crazy when it came to buying gifts. $50 crystal candy dishes were not out of the ordinary at all! And they bought gifts for every imaginable holiday. Valentine's Day, Easter, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Teacher Appreciation Day, Birthdays. Seriously there was some type of gift giving occasion every month...and I was paying tuition. I kind of gave up because frankly there was just no way I could keep up, let alone compete.

Okay rant over. :) This year I decided to take the trend of giving more personal, less expensive gifts that's all the rage and go with it. I made these jars that contain the dry ingredients for my favorite cookie recipe, and digiscrapped a recipe card to go with each jar. I covered the lids with Christmas print fabric and then took a strip of the fabric to tie the recipe card to the lid. My only concern is that I know sometimes teachers tend to think "ick" whenever it comes to any type of homemade food. I'm hoping that since it's just flour, sugar, oats, baking powder, salt and cinnamon they consider it safe enough and if not then I'm hoping the fact that they've known me (and my kids) for long enough to know my kitchen is clean enough to eat out of! lol

So here it is, my first kinda-sorta-hybrid project.

Feeling overwhelmed

2008-12-17T18:35:00.003-06:00

For the last couple of months I have this sense of being completely overwhelmed, mostly in regards to my kids. Since Nicholas's teacher mentioned learning disability and holding him back I'm second guessing myself at every turn. I'm not confident in anything I'm doing or have done. The concept of being supermom--something I laughingly considered myself in the past--makes me a little bit nauseous.

I remember having this feeling once before. Maddy was a newborn, days and weeks old, and had a raging case of colic. Screaming at random intervals day or night without warning and I was completely helpless and powerless to make it stop. I figured it was a sign that I was not capable of being the mom she needed and even considered asking my parents to raise her. Now granted this was at 5 am with absolutely no sleep whatsoever for 48 hours while hubby slept upstairs so he could go to work in a few minutes. Irrational, completely irrational.

It was only a year or two later when I looked back on how I felt in those first few weeks and months of her life that I realized I had had a case of post-partum depression that nobody recognized the symptoms of, including myself.

So now I find myself wondering about having these feelings of being overwhelmed and an unqualified parent again. Is this a sign of depression? I just don't know. Not to be sharing too much information, but this is my first month off birth control since the Essure proceedure a few months ago...so that's always a possible factor. And I'm sure that the holidays and trying to pay for gifts for everyone with limited funds isn't helping either.

In the end though this isn't really about me, or feeling overwhelmed, it's about doing what's best for the kids and being the best mom I can at all times.

I'm seeing signs of improvement in Nicholas. His speech is improving and he's starting to read small words both on his own and with help. He's gaining confidence in both his numbers and letters and some new skills they're learning like estimating and greater than/less than. I keep meaning to talk to the teacher after school and ask if she's seeing improvements too and if she's happy with what she's seeing, but to be perfectly honest I'm paralyzed with fear...I don't want her to say no she's not seeing improvement or that what she is seeing is too little too late, etc.

I wish I had a magic wand.

Recipe card holiday gifts

2008-12-16T17:51:00.005-06:00

I stole an idea from a friend and have been making a few recipe cards to give as gifts. My original plan was to turn some of my grandmother's recipes into a gift for my mother and sister and if I got that far a few of my aunts. But as usual I'm running pathetically far behind so that may or may not happen at this point. I've gotten two of Grandma's recipes turned into cards so far. I'm going to post them here but I'm just going to go ahead and say right up front I made them in such a hurry I didn't even keep track of what pages or elements I used, or where I got them from so APOLOGIES for that.

Radio City Christmas Spectacular!

2008-12-15T15:18:00.002-06:00

My father-in-law is a volunteer usher at one of the theaters in St Louis, so from time to time he's offered free tickets to shows but usually it's to shows nobody wants to see (hence the available tickets). At Maddy's birthday party a few weeks ago somehow the discussion got onto the shows he'd be working the next few weeks and from that list of shows inevitably all of us started listing the shows we wouldn't mind seeing. At this point it was just idle conversation since, as I said, he never gets tickets to any of the good shows only those that haven't sold out. He mentioned that the Rockettes would be at the theater for several weeks and was kind of groaning about how many times he'd have to watch the same show. Immediately all of us--well the females of the group anyway--said we would LOVE to see the Rockettes, and a few even admitted to wanting to BE a Rockette when they were younger.

Friday night the telephone rang and sure enough it was my father-in-law, asking for me--in 15 years of marriage I can safely say this has never, ever happened before. Turns out he had volunteered to work a few extra mattinee performances of the Rockettes show and as a thank you had been given four complimentary, orchestra level seats to this Friday's performance! Woot!

So Friday at 4:30 Maddy, my sister-in-law and her husband and I will be traveling across the river to watch the Radio City Christmas Spectacular! Those of you who read the blog with any frequency will already know that my daughter is extremely into dancing. She takes two hours of dance lessons per week, and this doesn't even count the amount of time she spends twirling, spinning, leaping, dancing through our house here. I'm glad we're getting to see the show together, and I'm even more glad that at ten years old it'll be a memory she'll get to carry with her. I can only hope that the live performance lives up to the videos she's Googled and found online since we got the word! She's probably seen half the show already! LOL

More trouble for my dad

2008-12-12T15:15:00.002-06:00

I hate that this blog is turning into one big downer where I seemingly do nothing but whine about everyone in my family's health issues. I appreciate the outlet though but I understand if you'd like to skip these posts. :)

My dad had a CT scan done of his back a few weeks ago just to rule out any other issues causing the residual nerve pain in his chest. On that scan they saw nothing in his back but "something" vague on his chest in the image, so they sent him back for another CT scan of his chest this time to see what the "something" was. Earlier this week I was at my parents house when the neurologist office called to say they had his CT results and were referring him back to his general practitioner for "diagnosis and treatment" all very mysterious and vague. Of course this was after normal office hours so Dad had to wait until the next morning to call his GP and get some more details. Turns out they saw "nonspecified changes to the nodules" and are referring him to a pulmonologist. Now, I don't know alot about this stuff, but thanks to Google and a co-worker whose husband has experience with nodules I've learned that nodules are something that appear in your lungs. Sometimes they can be no problem at all, sometimes they can be problematic because of their size or location, and last but not least sometimes they can be cancerous.

My parents have been smokers for over 40 years, Dad quit a few months before his heart attacks this summer. Ironic, right?

So, he goes to the pulmonologist on December 29th and gets to find out whether the pulmonologist thinks they're cancerous, otherwise problematic, or just something that's there but not to be worried about.

Prayers and positive thoughts appreciated.

Like it or not, Christmas is coming!

2008-12-11T14:28:00.002-06:00

Yesterday was (finally) payday so I got with the program and headed out to start the Christmas shopping. It seems that no matter how much I plan to do it differently, I'm destined to be a last minute shopper. I got the kids each their "big" gift, and that's really an exaggerated description. Since we bought a new desktop computer, printer, etc in October I made sure the kids know that was meant to be part of their Christmas but their old computer just didn't cooperate and died before Halloween! :)

I'm consolidating a lot of gifts this year, doing couple gifts for my sister and brother-in-law as well as my parents. I'm also doing one gift for my three nephews to share. Hubby's family will each get their own gifts but I'm going much smaller this year than I normally would. Teachers are getting homemade gifts (dry ingredients to a favorite cookie recipe layered in a pretty jar with the recipe attached). To be honest, teacher gifts are always a pain in the butt for me. This is not to say I don't appreciate the jobs my children's teachers do, but hopefully I show my appreciation for that throughout the school year, and it annoys me to have to come up with gifts for them when really I don't know them outside the classroom. Rant over. :)

Ho Ho Ho!

Post-Op Final Update

2008-12-10T15:53:00.002-06:00

Hubby had his check up with the ENT yesterday who pronounced him "healing well". He goes back in 3 weeks for a final check up and then he'll be completely released. Until then he's supposed to begin using Veramyst 2x a day to keep the swelling down and keep things moist (yuck) to keep scarring down to a minimum.

As his wife I can tell you that he already feels better post-op than he did before surgery, even not completely healed. He sleeps better--and by this I mean he doesn't make a sound while he sleeps. No snoring, no coughing, nothing! It's remarkable, truly. :) He has more energy, because he's sleeping better and getting more rest. He doesn't have a constant headache or feel like he constantly needs to blow his nose even though there's nothing there. And all of these things translate into him being in a better mood, because quite simply he feels better! I kind of feel like I got my husband back.

My only complaint is that because his nose and just below his nose (mustache area) are still very sensitive and he's very leery of bumping his nose on anything--I haven't gotten a smooch in over a week. Now, I don't know about you but we don't go days and days without at least a peck. In fact, Hubby kisses me good bye every morning when he leaves for work, even though I'm sound asleep. I told him to ask his doctor when he can give the wife a real kiss again, but he seemed to think that might be embarrassing. Boys! lol

Overheard in my house this morning

2008-12-06T14:21:00.002-06:00

I was baking Christmas cookies this morning, had most of the counter and table covered with either ingredients, dishes to be washed, or cookies to cool. Nicholas goes running up to Maddy and I hear the following conversation:

Nicholas: Sissy, wanna color with me?
Maddy: No, not right now.
Nicholas: Please? I will give you a hug? Two hugs? Three BIIIIIG hugs? C'mon!
Maddy (now laughing): You're already hugging me and I still don't wanna color!
Nicholas: Okay, if I stop hugging you will you color with me?

What a week

2008-12-05T17:10:00.004-06:00

I can't remember ever being so glad to see Friday get here as I am today. Between Hubby's surgery and other stressful and upsetting things this week I feel like either curling up with a good book for a few days and ignoring the world or soaking in the hot tub with a margarita until I turn all pruney!

A quick update on the Hubs. He's feeling quite a bit better but honestly I'd be hard pressed to tell you if that's because he's recovering so well or because he's pretty consistent with taking 2 vicodin every 4 hours like clockwork. :) He did tell me today that he's realizing food and drinks taste a lot different--better!--to him than they did before and that his sense of smell is a LOT stronger than it was before. The funny part of that is it only occured to him to tell me that little tidbit after he'd opened a beer this evening! All week he's been talking about the lonely few beers that were stashed in the back of the fridge from last weekend and how he was going to have one tonight...he's said that every night and hasn't opened one until today! LOL I teased him and said, any chance they taste bad now and you just don't care for beer anymore? He laughed, so I guess not. :)

I must be tired, because he went to meet a friend after work, mostly just to get out of the house since he's done nothing but lay around and watch daytime TV all week and I can't help but find myself having a bit of a pity party for myself. I mean I'm the one who has busted her behind all week taking care of his every need from fetching drinks, to tissues, to running to the drug store, to giving the doctors office hell for not getting him meds to driving him anywhere he needed to go and yet I'm here alone with Nicholas while he's out having a good time to blow off some steam.

Wow, was that one long run on sentence or what. I'm too tired to edit...so just deal. :)

It just brings home the point yet again that I really, really need to get out of the house more often and make some honest to goodness, real life, face to face, type friends. Not that I don't love each and every one of you out there my cyber-friends & family. But the simple fact is none of you can come to my house right now and listen to me vent about the hubs while I make us margaritas, now can you?

:)

You realize of course this means I'm left with no choice but to go bake my brains out for the next several hours in order to blow off some steam. I hope you're happy with yourself. :-)

Do you ever get a song stuck in your head?

2008-12-04T21:12:00.003-06:00

I keep hearing snippets of this song on TLC commercials, and they played it on Jon & Kate Plus 8 (which I love, as embarrassing as that is) so I finally had to give in and Google it so I could hear the whole thing. It's beautiful!

Post-op Day Three

2008-12-04T09:02:00.002-06:00

Doctors are morons. Last night we had to go to the funeral home (yes again) and one of Hubby's cousins was there with her husband. She's a pharmacist and he has his doctorate in pharmacology (??that sounds so wrong). Between the two of them they assured us that hubby's reaction was not from the Vicodin but the Prednisone. Which was also the reason for all the restless nights we've had this week. They said to go back to the Vicodin because it will work MUCH better for his pain and it lasts longer which will be better for at night and they said instead of taking two big doses of the steroid cut the pills in half and take several small doses through the day and then he won't feel jittery and unable to sleep, and it won't upset his stomach either.

It just ticks me off because when I called the doctor on the exchange that first night I said he was having a reaction to the prednisone and that doctor assured me that prednisone was very well tolerated and that the reaction was to the Vicodin--a statement which led to almost 24 hours without pain meds!